April 27, 2012
People Pleaser or God
Pleaser?
Transformational Thought
Who doesn’t want to see their kids happy,
especially if we are the one bringing them delight? I love to please my
daughters. But I also want to see them safe and healthy. So when they make
unhealthy or dysfunctional requests, it is easy for me to say “NO!” … even
though they aren’t pleased, and in fact, they might actually be upset, or cry
because of my answer.
Need a couple of examples? What about when they
ask … for their third bowl of ice cream … for the keys to the car and they’re
only 13 … to stay out to midnight on a school night when they’re 14 … to camp
out with a boyfriend, alone, when they are 16. All these will easily get a “no”
answer from me regardless of how displeased my beloved daughters might be with
my answer.
When fellow adults make dysfunctional requests,
for some reason, for most of us, it is much harder to say “no”. Why is it hard
to say ‘No’ to an adult? Sometimes it’s because I think they know more than I
do about the particular situation … or they know what’s best for themselves
more than I do … or I fear and hate being uneasy when people are mad or upset
at me … or I fear their rejection … or I need their approval … or I need to be needed or accepted. Too many “I
need…” or “I fear…” lenses, based on a me-centered mentality, significantly
interfere with our perspective, and lead to disrespectful, dysfunctional, or
even sinful relational conduct.
When we focus on trying to please people by
acting dysfunctionally, then our behavior is not serving or pleasing God. If we
are truly His servants, then our primary goal will be to please Him first, not
others.
When Jesus lived on earth, many who believed in
Him would not admit their faith. Because these people were more concerned about
personal safety and other people’s opinions rather than God’s opinion, they did
not live out their faith. Likewise, when we live as people-pleasers, we are
demonstrating the fact that we are more concerned about people’s approval instead
of God’s … and therefore our walk with Him will always be hindered.
Today, ask yourself: What is my greatest
perceived need or greatest perceived threat when someone makes a request of me …
or when I feel the need to people-please in a relationship? Whom am I trying to
please ... God or the person? Maybe most of your life is lived to please God,
but there is still some situation … or some person … that triggers you to be a
people-pleaser. God wants us to put Him first in all things … we cannot please
Him by placing more importance on people’s opinions … or our needs … over His. Pleasing God is your decision, so
choose well.
Prayer
Dear Father God, I do want to please You. Forgive
me for the times I let my desire to be accepted by a person outweigh my desire
to please You. Thank You for Your love and for accepting me unconditionally.
Help me to be a better servant, doing the right thing, not the people-pleasing
thing, as I grow healthy relationships with others. Give me courage and peace
to withstand the pressure I feel when others are displeased with my answers. I
pray this and all prayers in the name of the One who was the perfect servant,
Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say - AMEN!
The Truth
I am not trying to please people. I want to
please God. Do you think I am trying to please people? If I were doing that, I
would not be a servant of Christ.
Galatians 1:10
Many people did believe in him, however,
including some of the Jewish leaders. But they wouldn’t admit it for fear that
the Pharisees would expel them from the synagogue. For they loved human praise
more than the praise of God.
John 12:42-43
Kw: , Needs, People-Pleasing, Conflict
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