Stepping Stones: Claim The Victory, It’s Already Won!

April 21-22, 2012

Claim The Victory, It’s Already Won!

Transformational Thought

Have you ever had that feeling? You know what I’m talking about. Life seems to be going well, everything is falling into place. You are on a roll, hit a streak. But then, out of the blue, all of a sudden, it comes like a thief in the night. I will feel a cold, wet blanket come over me. A memory from my past creeps into my mind … then it feels like all the goodness gets sucked right out of the moment like the most powerful vacuum you’ve seen just got in you head and replaces all the good stuff with negative. Shame, guilt, doubt, worry, or regret instantly flood my mind and seek to control my heart.

Perhaps you have made some poor choices in the past and are suffering the consequences. Maybe you have suffered a traumatic personal loss. Perhaps you have suffered abuse from a parent or spouse or another “trusted” person. It doesn’t have to be a “major” trauma either. Most hurts for any 6 y.o. are somewhat “traumatic” because we usually don’t have very good coping mechanisms or interpreters in our life to put the hurt of being picked last on the playground in proper context for us.

Many of these minor hurts, unless interpreted and processed well, which most kids never do, leave lingering messages of doubt and confusion that Satan uses to steal away times of joy and blessing.

Read today’s scripture carefully. God promises that despite all these obstacles of life, you can have overwhelming victory through Christ. Come to Him for help … and forgiveness. If you let Christ in, nothing … absolutely nothing … can separate you from His love. No reason all that stuff from the past should steal another minute of your joy and happiness. A victory doesn’t just mean to win … it means a decisive win … a win that leaves no doubt.

It is easy to look at scriptures about God’s love and think, “Yes, God loves all people.” But in our innermost being we don’t include ourselves in the “all people.” We think, “I’m different … I’m just not good enough … That’s alright for other people, but I’ve made too many mistakes. I’ve got special circumstances. It’s too late for me.” We need to examine and search for the lies that keep us feeling defeated with no chance of winning in this life on Earth.

God’s Word makes it abundantly clear that you are included. No matter what you have done. No matter what other people say or think about you. No matter what you think about yourself. God loves you. Jesus died for you. Nothing will ever separate you from His love.

Today, stop when you struggle. Tell yourself “God loves me and He proved it.” Then consider how that changes your view of the moment. Walk with Jesus and you can have overwhelming victory over every problem and obstacle in your life. The problems might still be there … the obstacles may still come. But you won’t have to face them alone or have a defeated attitude and perspective. God will empower you to overcome. Your joy and victory is your decision, so choose well.

Prayer

Dear Father God, thank You that these promises are not just for other people … but they are really for me. Thank You for your unconditional love. Thank You that no matter what happened in the past or comes my way in the future, I can walk in victory through Jesus. I pray this and all prayers in the name of the One who made my victory possible, Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth

No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us. And I know that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow … not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below … indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Romans 8:37-39

Stepping Stones: How Do You See Yourself?

April 20, 2012

How Do You See Yourself?

Transformational Thought

One of the more difficult parts of my job is listening as people tell their personal stories of being abused. Many women get abused by their husbands, and at times, husbands get abused by wives. The most disheartening stories are those of adults, and especially those of children, talking about the physical or sexual abuse that was perpetrated on them. We in Pennsylvania have certainly heard of the travesties and reports of serial molestations by high profile coach Jerry Sandusky.

Abuse takes many forms … but it is always debilitating. It cripples not only the direct victim, but also the abuser and the people who witness it. When kids witness abuse it is especially devastating. In the United States alone, husbands and partners batter 3 to 4 million women each year. Three million reports of child abuse are made every year just in the United States. But experts estimate that the incidence of abuse and neglect is five times greater than reported. Many children are suffering from this hidden epidemic. While these are U.S. figures, the  same problems exist around the world, and in most places at much higher rates.

Last month, a YouTube video, KONY 2012, went viral. Joseph Kony is a ruthless militant rebel leader in Uganda who has been terrorizing a nation of kids for more than 20 years. He has used rape, maiming, disfigurement, and physical, emotional, and psychological abuse to kill off parents, and enslave or brainwash children to do his diabolic dirty work.

Abuse is a sin that dishonors God and disrespects His creation of life. Psychological abuse and spiritual abuse inflict critical damage above and beyond the terrible aspects of physical and sexual danger. The most chronic damage is the distortion of the lenses we need to see life accurately, from God’s perspective. We need eyes that see the truth. But abuse contaminates and significantly interferes with proper lens development.

Abuse erodes confidence and self-esteem. We begin believing what we are told about ourselves; we think that anyone treated violently and abusively must deserve it. These beliefs are often accepted early in life and become part of the initial lenses through which we see and process all information. Even if abuse occurs when we are older, the intensity of the experience makes it a formidable opponent to seeing ourselves as God sees us, our God-image.

Abuse communicates “I am worthless” … “I am an object to be used by you whenever you want” … “dignity, respect, and honor are not for me” … “I don’t deserve anything in life” … “I’ll never accomplish anything in life.” These distortions and interpretations form part of the foundation on which we build the rest of our lives.

Today, ask, “How do I see myself?” “Is my self-image based on other people’s words and actions toward me? Or is it based on the truth of God’s Word, a God-image?” God knew you before you were even born. He created you … and His works are wonderful. Let Jesus help take your focus off yourself and begin the process of training your eyes on Him. He is able to heal your eyes, to see yourself as He sees you.

Yes, as I wrote above, hearing reports of child abuse is the most difficult part of my job. On the flip side, being able to help these kids is a great blessing God has given me. In July this year, I will be privileged to lead a team of 6 into ground zero of Kony’s devastation in Gulu, Uganda. We will be working with 300 children who now live in refugee camps who were abused by Kony’s army and tactics. We will also be counseling and training 50 mentors who currently work with these 300 children. Unfortunately, most of these mentors were also victims of Kony’s terror. To read about our upcoming trip click here. This will be a very unique journey and the first of it’s kind in this area. Please support us financially and in prayer. The war isn’t over till the children are healed!

Prayer

Dear Father God, Thank You for this reminder that You formed me and made me … and that Your works are wonderful. I must admit, though, sometimes I don’t feel as though I’m wonderful at all. In fact, sometimes I feel as though I don’t deserve anything good. Help me to fully grasp what Jesus did for me. I pray this and all prayers in the name of Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth

For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.

Psalm 139:13-14

For this people's heart has grown dull, and with their ears they can barely hear, and their eyes they have closed, lest they should see with their eyes and hear with their ears and understand with their heart and turn, and I would heal them. But blessed are your eyes, for they see, and your ears, for they hear.

Matthew 13:15,16

Stepping Stones: You Are Never Alone!

April 19, 2012

 You Are Never Alone!

Transformational Thought

One of my favorite childhood TV shows was Gilligan’s Island. Did I ever have a crush on Maryanne! The cast had fun adventures with different strangers on the island, and constructed modern day amenities out of coconuts and palm tree leaves. But the most important item they had was really each other. By contrast, in the movie “Castaway,” Tom Hanks was stranded on an island by himself and went crazy.

Do you ever feel as if you are stranded on an island, all alone? The other day, I had a very difficult decision to make. The initial sense that came to me was “Wow, I have no help from anyone else, this is all on me, and me alone.” I felt isolation and loneliness … not really sensing anyone around to help me. I was in it by myself and had to bear the burden of getting all the info and making the decision, as well as the responsibility of bearing any consequences of making a wrong decision all by myself.

Whenever I am in the midst of one of life’s storms, I have this overwhelming feeling of loneliness … of being alone. Like I am on an island all by myself. Unable to ask questions, brainstorm with others, without anyone to encourage or comfort me. I can’t even see a ship or another island around providing the hope of some help. I can be standing in the middle of a crowded room yet feel completely alone.

We have all experienced loneliness. In fact many people struggling with depression feel as though they are alone most of the time. They often feel that no one cares or understands … as though even God is distant and unavailable, punishing us for not pursuing Him. When I was a kid, I often thought He was concerned with more important things in the world than my trivial life and frustrations.

Being a psychiatrist, I have many medical books about healing in my bookshelf, but the most accurate and powerful book is the Holy Bible. When I am feeling alone, I look in the Bible for the truth. Then I try to uncover the issues, distortions, or misinterpretations that influence me to believe the lie that God is not right there with me.

You may feel alone, but the truth, the actual reality, is that God is always with you. Here are just a few of His promises: I am with you (Genesis 28:15). I walk with you (Leviticus 26:12). I am near you (Psalm 34:18). I hold your right hand (Isaiah 41:13). I carry you even into old age (Isaiah 46:4).

You see, Satan has been pounding away at you since your first breaths to trick you into believing that: 1. God doesn’t exist; 2. If He does exist, He’s too busy for you; 3. If He isn’t too busy, then you’re not good enough yet; or 4. God is mean and punitive and has sent you to the dungeon or corner of life indefinitely.

Today, identify what lies you believe when you are under stress, like believing God is not with you. You must identify it or it will keep on influencing you. You need to practice debunking that lie, because you practiced believing the wrong way many times. Replace it with the truth so you can be encouraged by reading these scriptures and others like them. Write your favorites down and put them where you see them all the time. Speak them aloud. Substitute your own name for the word “you”. God says, I am with (your name) … I walk with (your name) … I am near (your name). God is speaking these promises to you personally. Remember … you are never alone. Jesus is with you. He is with you this moment. He will be with you tonight … and tomorrow. He will be with you through the good times and bad. He will never leave you. It’s your decision what you believe about God’s presence, so choose well. WITHIN REACH will help you uncover the lies you believe and practice replacing them with truth.

Prayer

Dear Father God, Thank You for Your many promises to be with me … always. Help me believe Your promises more than I believe my feelings. I pray, Father, for all those within the Stepping Stones community who feel they are alone. Help them dig to uncover the lies about You. Reveal Your presence in a powerful way. I pray this and all prayers in the name of the One who is always with me, Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth

The LORD is there to rescue all who are discouraged and have given up hope.

Psalm 34:18

Stepping Stones: Go on a Fox Hunt!

April 18, 2012

Go on a Fox Hunt!

Transformational Thought

The 1939 play, “The Little Foxes” by Lillian Hellman, was based on Scripture from Song of Solomon 2:15. The foundation of the play can be summed up this way: many times it’s the collection of all the small missteps that get us in trouble. Some marriages with no major problems still get into trouble because of an accumulation of little things. The Bible refers to these issues as the little foxes that ruin the vineyard.

You see, we are usually much better at crisis intervention than we are at regular maintenance. This is because we are a bit lazy, often manifested as procrastination, willing and able to ignore or table a small issue ‘til we can give it “more attention.” Work and effort are required to handle these little foxes, and we would rather invest that energy in enjoyable endeavors … fun activities. Or, if we are tackling trouble areas, we’ll invest the energy in bigger issues that have been put off too long, that demand attention now, and ignoring the little core issues that really need our attention.

Make a commitment to pay attention to the little foxes in your marriage: being thoughtless or preoccupied, making sarcastic comments, forgetting anniversaries or birthdays, criticizing, taking your spouse for granted, and not appreciating the little things they do. These little foxes might seem unimportant, but they can eventually knock a person, a marriage, and ultimately a whole family into the abyss of confusion, frustration, and despair. And it all starts with little, almost imperceptible issues.

Are you letting any foxes loose in your marriage? Are you spending time with your spouse, or has "busy-ness" taken over? Has that luster of wanting to spend every moment with him or her worn off? Remember when you couldn’t take your hands off each other? Remember when you couldn’t hang up because you would miss her voice? Do you really listen to him talk? Do you persist in that little habit that irritates your spouse? With God's help, identify these little pebbles before they become bigger divisive wedges.

For you single people, let me say all of the married people vowed never to let foxes into their vineyard. All have boasted, “That will never happen to me.” But as you see, we all fall prey to the insidious trickery of the sly foxes Satan uses to undermine what God has ordained and blessed. Safeguard your heart and mind now … before you get married. Practice these skills in all your relationships, then you will be better equipped. When the time comes you will have a better chance in your marriage. Also, these principles apply not just to marriage, but to every relationship we find ourselves in, especially that of a parent.

Today, go on a foxhunt to be sure pesky little patterns or habits aren't creeping up on you. Replace the destructive little foxes with acts of love and the willingness to put God at the center of the relationship. Address the issue head on. Plan a surprise dinner for two. Buy a sentimental gift. Join your spouse in one of his or her favorite activities … even if it's not your thing. These little acts of thoughtfulness can help a marriage move forward. Then authentic and difficult discussions can happen. Deeper relational fulfillment can be found. Your relationships are your  decision, so choose well.

Prayer

Dear God, Forgive me for how I have acted towards one of the greatest gifts You have given me, my spouse. Marriage is so powerful, but also tricky and complex. Help me become more aware of the "little foxes" that I bring to the marriage … and help me replace them with love as I focus on You. I wish I were a better husband, but with Your love for me, I can channel that love to my wife. I pray this and all prayers in the name of Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth

Catch all the foxes, those little foxes, before they ruin the vineyard of love, for the grapevines are blossoming!

Song of Solomon 2:15

Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.

Proverbs 4:23

Stepping Stones: Comfort Zone: Letting Go of Old Identities

April 17, 2012

Comfort Zone: Letting Go of Old Identities

Transformational Thought

Sometimes I like to ask people, “Who are you?” It’s interesting to hear the responses. Some give their name … others give their occupation. Another answer is a role the person fills in his family or organization. Not many share their real identities, what makes them, them … uniquely them, the one deep inside with a wonderful and distinctive blend of characteristics. 

In my practice, I treated a very interesting lady, whose experiences that could fill several lifetimes. As we worked together, she was able to free herself from a lesbian lifestyle and enter into a beautiful and enjoyable journey with God. She tells her story this way. "If you had asked me if I was born gay, I would have given you a resounding “yes.” Now, I realize I was not born gay, and I am not defined by the fact that I lived as a homosexual. When I came to God, He redefined me as a woman wonderfully made to honor Him by being a follower of Christ."

Often we define ourselves by a lifestyle, a role we play, or some of our personal characteristics. Whether these definitions are joyful or painful, good or bad, represent success or failure … they are comfort zones. And even when we come to Jesus, we might be reluctant to let go of some or even most of them because in our minds those are our comfort zones.

People who are in or coming from a homosexual lifestyle might consider the gay world a safe place. People caught in a workaholic mode base their worth on their accomplishments and successes. Being a mother, a church leader, an indispensable worker, a good friend … allows us to feel more control as we develop our earthly identities. But when we come to Jesus, it is vital to let go of those identities and come to recognize who we are in Christ.

You see, we have only 2 identity options. Option #1, your identity is based on who you are under your own power and based on your own personality. Or option #2, your identity comes from who Christ is and what He has done for you. Then the rest of your life is filled with responses to the option you chose. The former is weak, has lots of limitations, and is heavily weighted by inadequacies, failures, and fears. The latter has unlimited power, potential, opportunity, and joy. When you look at it that way, the decision, and yes, it is a decision, is a pretty easy choice to make, I would say.

Today, even though you may still be struggling with old habits, be encouraged that you can let go of the old definitions. This doesn’t happen overnight, but it can occur, one step at a time. Know that your most important identity is in Christ. There’s no better time to start making better decisions than today. Take a paper and make 3 columns: one titled “old Identity,” the next “new identity,” and third, “what would I believe differently about myself if I believed I were this new person?” Write in 5 elements of the old identity and fill in the next 2 columns for each. You are a new creation! God has a great plan for your life and He is worthy of your trust. With the empowering of His Holy Spirit, you can fulfill this new identity God has prepared for you! Remember, your life is your decision, so choose well.

Prayer

Dear Mighty Creator of Everything, I thank You for transforming me into a new creation when I became a follower of Christ. I still tend to see myself as "the old me." Please help me to see myself through Your eyes - cleansed and made new. The more I believe it, the more I will practice it, and the more I practice, the more I believe. I know the more I practice, the more proof You will give me so I can really believe, deep in my heart that You have made me into a new creation. And help me remember that no matter what other roles I play in life, my number one identity is always "a follower of Christ." I pray this and all prayers in the name of the One I follow, Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation; the old has gone, the new has come!

2 Corinthians 5:17

Stepping Stones: “The Ultimate Deal”

April 16, 2012

Transformational Thought

In the last Stepping Stones, we discussed our curiosity and need to make deals over material and psychological issues, and even spiritual issues. Some people spend their whole lives trying to make deals with themselves to avoid pain or to “guarantee” some reward with God or with their loved ones who have issues. Life is a roller coaster of ups and downs: highs when the deal seems to pay off and lows when the expected payoff doesn’t occur. Some who are concerned about a loved one’s life-interfering problem are blessed enough to pass through the deal-making stage and reach the next phase, the stage of acceptance.

A major professional and personal hurdle in my life occurred when I came to grips with understanding that a patient’s potential suicide would not be my fault. I had influence in their life but not control. That person’s life and death was between self and God. I could do everything right, and he or she could die. On the flip side, I could do everything wrong, and God could preserve that life. I have seen many medical colleagues suffer from the “God Complex” and go crazy under that constant pressure.

Acceptance is a welcome place of relief in which we can finally turn our loved one over to God ... to His love and discipline … to His mercy and grace ... to His healing power. Releasing our struggling loved one to God does not mean that we no longer care what happens. It means that we have accepted the reality of the situation and the fact that we can't fix the problem on our own.

Relinquishing control and ownership of a situation that significantly affects us is so hard to do. At times, having less angst in a painful situation makes us feel as though we love the other person less. We really have to strike a balance in the spectrums of control, power, care and love. Too much or too little of these can definitely be unhealthy.

Unfortunately, our flesh, past baggage, and distortions often interfere with Godly thinking in these areas. We have often interpreted past successes as results of our own power, strategy or manipulation. Previous letdowns or struggles are blamed on others, “reaffirming” the mentality that if we had been in control, the situation would have worked out better. In reality, we have some influence over activities outside of our bodies, but no control.

Based on this, we need to make the ultimate deal. This is where we emotionally detach ourselves from our loved ones, even as we continue to love them and trust God's guidance in redesigning our roles in their lives. The ultimate deal we make is with God. We surrender either our need for the other person to change, or the need to be the change agent ourselves. So what do we get in return? God can conform us to the likeness of Christ, as we become dependent on Him. You see, not even Christ could change people. He left it in His Father’s hands.

Today, acknowledge that your loved ones themselves are responsible for their own behaviors … accept your powerlessness to change them. Admit that you need nothing from anybody in order to experience peace, contentment and growth. Tying your happiness to someone else’s behavior is a cop-out, an excuse - conforming to the flesh’s view and strategy of what you need. Let go and let God, and be a good steward of the “The Ultimate Deal.” WITHIN REACH can help you take the concrete steps to gain this freedom in God.

Prayer
Almighty and Loving God, help me come to this point of acceptance. I know I can't fix my loved one's problems. I know he has to take responsibility for his own choices. Help me to let go. Help me to rest in You, knowing that You love him even more than I do, and that You alone are able to help him. Help me be dependent on You, not on someone else’s actions for my joy and happiness. I pray this and all prayers in the name of the One who is my rock and my salvation, Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
Let all that I am wait quietly before God, for my hope is in Him. He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress where I will not be shaken.
Psalm 62:5-6

Stepping Stones: “Let’s Make a Deal”

April 14-15, 2012

Transformational Thought

While on vacation last month, I saw the new version of the classic game show, “Let’s Make a Deal.” What a great show … you could be dealing for a donkey, a gigantic candy bar, or a brand new car. The suspense of not knowing what you’ll win, the challenge of trying to manipulate the game, the freedom and fear of not being in control, and the uncertainty of what the other person will do, (especially the original host, Monty Hall), are all enticing elements that draw me into this bargaining game.

It’s common for people concerned about someone with a life-interfering behavior (like addictions, food issues, or impulsive choices), emotional struggles, relational conflict, or health issue to try to strike bargains with themselves, with the person, with others, and with God. We might promise ourselves that we will be better, that we’ll say the right thing next time, that we’ll make things right. We promise to refrain from something enjoyable to show our repentance. We try to resist harmful temptations to show we are serious. All these promises are made in exchange for something we desire from others or ourselves.

We might set up deals with the loved one to reward them for refraining from their problem behavior. Or we might bargain with God and try to make a deal with Him. We promise to give to the church, to do some good deeds, to give up gossip or a sexual sin, if only He will fix our own or our loved ones' problems. I once promised God I would never have sex again if he would just let my girlfriend not be pregnant.

If you are in this deal-making stage, you need to understand that help for a friend or loved one doesn't depend on your performance. God has a specific plan for that person’s life and the transformation process is between them and God. God may want to use you in the person’s life. We all have some potential influence, but we have no power. We are in no position and have no leverage to bargain with God. When you think about it, what do we really have to offer in a deal with God?

Satan wants us to believe we live in a random system of earning God’s favor, and that God is a capricious wheeler-dealer. Trying to earn God’s favor so He will help our loved one makes us like Aladdin - with God as the genie under our control. How backward is that?

Today, accept your powerlessness to change another person. Don’t try bargaining with God as if He were on another team. Learn to actually join God’s team and let Him be your captain, and then follow His instruction. Maybe He does want to utilize your influence with the person or situation. You need to view the experience as one of growth for you. If the other person is able to see God through you and engage with God more, that is awesome. But your goal is to follow God regardless of the response of others. Life is your decision, so choose well.

Prayer
Dear Holy God, all my efforts have failed. No matter what I do, I realize now that I can't fix my loved one's problems. But I thank You that You can. Your grace is enough. Help me to let go and trust You. Saying that, let me know how you want me to engage with my loved one so I can grow more mature and stronger in my relationship with You. Help me understand how You want to use me for my growth and help me leave the changing of my loved one up to You. I pray this and all prayers in the name of the One who can fix all things, Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.
2 Corinthians 12:9

Stepping Stones: Don’t Listen to the Accuser’s Tapes

April 13, 2012

Transformational Thought

During the most difficult time in my life, I was constantly scurrying and trying to dig myself out of trouble. I would find answers, but they were just short-term fixes - knee-jerk responses that brought temporary relief but more probIems. I would just wonder to myself, “what is going on,” “will I ever get a break,” “when will it stop,” or “why can’t I get it right?”

Do you, or somebody you know sometimes feel as though you are fighting your way through life and losing the hard-fought battle? Does it seem you are always falling farther and farther behind? Maybe you feel you’re such a failure that no one would or could help you.

Most of us have experienced these feelings, whether for fleeting moments when distressed, extended periods of time, or even whole seasons of life. If you suffer from chronic depression like so many people, you might feel alone and hopeless most of the time. When well-meaning people try to cheer you up by pointing out your good qualities or the positive aspects of your life, you may hear what they are saying as either false praise or else as words of one who doesn't know you and your deeper issues very well.

Well, there is someone who knows you better than you know yourself ... someone who wants to give you hope and help you win the battle. His name is Jesus. He promises you peace (John 14:27). He intercedes to God the Father for you (John 17:9). He promises to work all things for your good (Romans 8:28). He rides on the Heavens to help you (Deuteronomy 33:26).

You may say, "Those promises sound good for someone else, but they couldn't be for me. I don't deserve them. You don't know me." This may be true … but Jesus DOES know you. And He loves you. If no one else had existed, He would have died on the cross just for you. He loves you that much. None of us deserves that kind of love, but the beautiful part is we don’t have to deserve it, because Jesus gives it freely and unconditionally.

Today, actually use this truth in how you view yourself and your circumstances. Write down who you think you are and why you believe that. Are those beliefs based on facts? Are they earthly facts or heavenly facts? Are they the facts of the prosecution? Now list the facts that Jesus presents on your behalf. Above all else … let Him love you. Open your heart to the hope and healing that comes only from Him. It is your decision whether you will see the person Satan has brainwashed you to see, or the person that God sees - sanctified through the work of Jesus and His love. Listening to those tapes is your decision, so choose well.

Prayer
Dear Father God, thank You for loving me unconditionally. Thank You for sending Your only Son to die for me. Thank You, Jesus, for dying for me. When I'm feeling down, help me to remember Your love for me, to experience Your love, and to share Your love with others. I pray to You, Father, for all those in the world today suffering from depression. May they see themselves through Your eyes, and seek Your peace in the right places. I pray this and all prayers in the name of the One who knows me better than I know myself, Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
May you experience the love of Christ, though it is too great to understand fully. Then you will be made complete with all the fullness of life and power that comes from God.
Ephesians 3:19

Then he showed me Joshua the high priest standing before the angel of the LORD, and Satan standing at his right hand to accuse him. The LORD said to Satan, “The LORD rebuke you, Satan! Indeed, the LORD who has chosen Jerusalem rebuke you! Is this not a brand plucked from the fire?” Now Joshua was clothed with filthy garments and standing before the angel. He spoke and said to those who were standing before him, saying, “Remove the filthy garments from him.” Again he said to him, “See, I have taken your iniquity away from you and will clothe you with festal robes.” Then I said, “Let them put a clean turban on his head.”
Zechariah 3:1-5

Stepping Stones: Who’s the Tattooed Person God Put in Your Life?

April 12, 2012

Transformational Thought

A friend of mine went to a concert to hear one of his favorite recording artists of all time, Kenny Loggins. His description of the music and the show were great. But more interesting to me was a story my friend shared about an interesting encounter that night.

Before the doors opened, he noticed a much younger man who really stuck out because he was covered with tattoos. He actually had large fangs tattooed on his lower lip and chin with blood dripping down. My friend first thought …”this guy scares me,” and he wondered why a guy like that would be at a Kenny Loggins concert.

A few minutes later they were standing right next to each other, and when their eyes met, he offered the most genuine smile … and today’s scripture came into his mind. He began asking him about his tattoos … and then they talked about Kenny Loggins. They both really loved Kenny’s music. The tattoo man was kind, polite and very reserved. When asked which tattoo was his favorite, he pointed to a little Christmas tree on the top of his hand. Even with his fangs tattoo, he was no longer scary. Now I certainly don’t know his story … but I do know one thing … like you and me, he needs God’s attention and love.

The Scriptures offer a multitude of “one another” commands concerning relationships with others … encourage one another, be devoted to one another, honor one another, live in harmony with one another, accept one another, instruct one another, serve one another, forgive one another … and on and on. “Love one another” is at the core of all of them.

In today’s scripture, Jesus tells us to love one another as He has loved us. Of course, Jesus’ love is greater than we can ever imagine having or displaying to anyone … but He is telling us to follow His example. Jesus loves us unconditionally and He wants us to love others unconditionally … not based on personality or looks or behavior or even feelings. Unconditionally. Now that doesn’t mean we give them everything they want. Our actions should be based on their needs for growth, not our needs for comfort.

Jesus loved with His actions, humbling Himself, coming to earth as a baby, and growing and living among us ... suffering the indignities and torture of the cross, demonstrating the depth of His love in ways words could not begin to explain. Jesus wants us to love unconditionally too, demonstrating love through actions … even when we don’t “feel” like it.

Today, ask God to help you see the tattooed person in your life through His eyes. Ask Him to help you love this person even if he or she doesn’t “deserve” it. And then step out in faith and love through your actions. As we in the family of God demonstrate our love for each other, even as Jesus demonstrated His love for us, others will “know we are His disciples.” Our love for one another can help draw them to see and accept the perfect love of Jesus. Love in your decision, so choose well.

Prayer
Dear Father God, help me to love others in the way You love me. Help me to love unconditionally. Help me to demonstrate my love with action … even when I don’t feel like it sometimes. Allow me to be more humble to the Holy Spirit and to apply Your instruction to my relationships more intentionally. Thank You for loving me unconditionally. Thank You for demonstrating your love in such marvelous ways. I pray this and all prayers in the name of the One who loved through his actions, Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this all men will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.
John 13:34-35

Stepping Stones: “One Another-ing”

April 11, 2012

Transformational Thought

When I argue (because, obviously, I’m too mature to fight) with my wife or daughters, I hurt, because they’re my family and I care so deeply for them. We are related in a much stronger way with our brothers and sisters who are fellow believers in Christ. I’ve experienced this incredibly strong tie during mission trips, becoming connected to and caring for someone I recently met, might never see again, and have seemingly little in common with, except for the fact that we are bonded through Christ.

All through the Bible, we find “one another” Scriptures that instruct us in the kinds of caring actions and attitudes that ought to characterize our relationships as brothers and sisters in Christ. God clearly defines what kind of relationships we should have … and yet we often fail to develop the type of relationship that He desires for us. And when we fail, we not only add unnecessary stress to our lives and the lives of those around us … but we also fail to illustrate the love of Jesus to unbelievers who may be observing us.

Our natural instincts are to be independent, not trusting or collaborating with others. Our goal is “what’s in it for me?” as opposed to, “what is the greatest good of the team?” Satan is always trying to accentuate the hurts of relationships to encourage a “me-first” attitude. We struggle to overcome that outlook, and we need to so that we can bond and serve with others. Remember that we are on the same team and Satan is the enemy. As Satan tries to pit us against each other, we forget he is even in the game, let alone that he is the enemy.

God has blessed each of us with gifts and talents and placed us within a body of believers who have also received a variety of gifts. As we live with each other in harmony and love, focused on God’s plan, we can impact the world so much more if we pool our unique talents rather than each trying to do our own thing. Along the way, we will also develop relationships that we can count on—relationships built on a foundation of God’s love.

Do you see yourself as part of God’s team? Are you and other Christians in your church … and in other churches and ministries in your community … working together in harmony? Are you stuck focusing on differences … or on God’s bigger plan?

Today, ask God to show you what you can do to improve your relationship with a specific brother or sister in Christ. Perhaps it’s someone you have criticized … or someone you feel as though you are competing against. Maybe you have bickered about theology or passed judgment on another’s behavior. Ask God to help you relate to this person in love and harmony and build His kind of “one another” relationship. Relationships are your decision, so choose well.

Prayer
Dear Father God, I know there are times when I let personal feelings and differences interfere in my relationship with other believers. Show me the barriers of insecurity and pride that interfere as I engage with others. Please forgive me and help me have the “one another” relationships described in your Word. Even though I might be in some minor conflict with another, help me know that Satan is the enemy, and he is just trying to use others to derail me. I pray this and all prayers in the name of the One who completes my joy, Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
Fill up and complete my joy by living in harmony and being of the same mind and one in purpose, having the same love, being in full accord and of one harmonious mind and intention.
Philippians 2:2

Stepping Stones: Forgiveness: An Act of Service

April 9, 2012

Transformational Thought

In some ways, forgiveness is so simple and in other respects so complicated. And that’s true whether we are trying to forgive ourselves or a person who has hurt us. As you probably have realized, we often address forgiveness in our devotionals, and that’s for one important reason: IT IS SO HARD TO DO! Like most psychological activities, forgiveness is a skill; nobody is born good at it. Learn it the right way, then practice, practice, practice. , and you will get much better at it.

Forgiveness is one of the most important choices to act on after receiving eternal life through Christ’s death on the Cross. Why? Extending forgiveness to those who have wronged us acknowledges our understanding of God and His forgiveness of us. To have a relationship with God and live in Heaven with Him we need God’s forgiveness for our sins. We then need to live in that forgiveness and forgive ourselves. That’s easier said than done, if you really analyze your view of yourself and some of your motivations.

Jesus came to die for us so we can live in an intimate and incredible relationship with God … an Abundant Life … liberated from sin and Satan. God created us to do good works and to be shining lights. We can’t become all God designed us to be if we harbor resentment and bitterness towards others or ourselves. It is vital that we make the choice, yes, a decision, to forgive and, if possible, to reconcile with the person who has hurt us.

The first step towards reconciliation begins with your thoughts. One of several areas to think about is the other person’s needs rather than their faults. How can you serve that person and God by forgiving him or her? Then begin to think well of that person and speak well of him or her to someone close to you, drawing attention to strengths and needs, rather than offenses. Next take action … begin to seek reconciliation. And read some of our past devotionals on forgiveness.

You might be in a difficult situation in which the other party is not willing to reconcile. If this is the case, make sure you have forgiven in your own heart. Then keep yourself ready to pursue further reconciliation, if and when the other person is ready.

Today, ask God to open your eyes, using spiritual lenses to see the other person’s needs and issues. Wait on God’s timing for the individual to join in total reconciliation. It may not be safe to be physically reconciled with some people. Don’t try to force it … let God work it out in His way and time. You are responsible for your heart and your part, not the other person’s. Above all, remember that Jesus loves you, and He will give you the strength and courage you need … abundantly. Forgiveness is your decision, so choose well.

Prayer
Dear Father God, in all my relationships, help me dwell on things worthy of praise, not things to curse. And especially help me to do this when I think or speak about the one who has offended me. May I walk in forgiveness and be open to reconciliation in Your way and in Your time. I pray this and all prayers in the name of the One died for my forgiveness so I can extend it to others; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
Summing it all up, friends, I'd say you'll do best by filling your minds and meditating on things true, noble, reputable, authentic, compelling, gracious … the best, not the worst; the beautiful, not the ugly; things to praise, not things to curse.
Philippians 4:8

For everyone has sinned; we all fall short of God's glorious standard. Yet God, with undeserved kindness, declares that we are righteous. He did this through Christ Jesus when he freed us from the penalty for our sins.
Romans 3:23-24

So I say, live by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of a sinful nature. For the sinful nature desires what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary to the sinful nature.
Galatians 5:16-17

Stepping Stones: Don’t Take Away My…

April 5, 2012

Transformational Thought

Security means different things to different people. Some people feel secure if their health is good, many experience security if their finances are strong, and others if they’re surrounded by a loving family. But depending on people or things for your ongoing and complete security will eventually result in disappointment, because all the things of this world are limited and fallible.

Suppose you work for a company many years, building up a healthy retirement fund that you depend on for security in later life. Soon after your 60th birthday, the company falters and the retirement fund disappears. If your security has been in that retirement plan, you’ll be devastated and will experience fear and anxiety as you face the future.

But if you recognize that God, not the retirement fund, is the real source for all your needs, you can rest in the assurance that He has a plan … and that He will take care of you. Nothing takes God by surprise. You might not see His plan, but you can be confident that He saw what would happen and has everything under control.

The same principle applies when you lose a job, when a friend moves, when you get a scary diagnosis, when your child has a special issue … or when any part of your agenda doesn’t go as you planned. If your confidence, security, and thus, your faith is in the job … friend … health … agenda, it is inevitable that you will lose hope. Or at the very least, you’ll have a fragile hope.

But when your faith is in Jesus, you know that He never changes. Nothing can separate you from His love. And He will provide a way just as He promises. Often times, He provides in a way that is foreign to you to “prove” that He is at work in your life, that it wasn’t your effort. That is why the Bible says God works in mysterious ways. His ways aren’t really mysterious to Him. They make perfect sense to God. Since we weren’t expecting God’s solution, we think it is luck, a mystery, or a miracle. That is why we need to keep our eyes open throughout the day. Peace and other provisions from God may come in ways we are not expecting.

Today, examine what you fear losing. It’s ok to feel sadness for that loss. But if you would feel fear or anxiety, or lose sleep if it were taken away from you, then you are probably depending on that particular element too much. Ask God to show you how He will meet that need and lessen your grip on the thing you fear losing. He is your rock, so rest on and build your life on Him. He will be the solid foundation on which to build all the elements of your life. Life is your decision, so choose well.

Prayer
Dear Father God, forgive me for the times I have depended on other people and things, and then lost hope when they let me down. Help me to use the knowledge and truth of Your word to utilize the blessings You have provided me, but not to become dependent on them. Help me to remember that You are my ultimate source of comfort and provision, and that You are unchanging and totally trustworthy. Thank You for supplying all my needs. I pray this and all prayers in the name of the One who died for my biggest need, Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
And this same God who takes care of me will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:19

For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, saith the LORD. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways, and my thoughts than your thoughts.
Isaiah 55:8-9

You are the GOD who does wonders; You have made known Your strength among the peoples. By Your arm You have redeemed Your people, The sons of Jacob and Joseph. Selah. The waters saw You, O Elohim; The waters saw You, they were afraid; The depths also trembled. The clouds poured out water; The heavens rumbled; Also, Your arrows flashed back and forth. The voice of Your thunder rolled along; Lightnings lit up the world; The earth trembled and shook. Your way was in the sea, And Your path in the great waters, And Your footsteps were not known.
Psalms 77:14-19

Stepping Stones: Mixed Super Bowl Memories

February 4-5, 2012

Transformational Thought

I’m a Steelers’ fan … born in the Pittsburgh area … so Super Bowls in the 70’s, my teen years, were unbelievable events as my beloved Steel Curtain smashed their way to an unprecedented 4 championships in 6 years. Teamwork, sacrifice, perseverance, commitment, intentionality, practice, heroes, legends, invincibility, power, role models. I learned so much through those fun Super Bowl Sundays.

For a while though, Super Bowl Sunday also conjured up some terrible memories. You see, from late high school through college and into medical school, I made a lot of poor choices leading to many issues including a significant alcohol addiction. My worst memory ever: January 25, 1987, Super Bowl Sunday … middle of medical school, an awesome future ahead of me. It started off at a party with a bunch of med school friends. Through a series of progressively stupider decisions … consuming lots of alcohol, winning $600, more “celebrating” at a strip bar, driving drunk (after a severe snow and ice storm), 6 counts of aggravated assault, a cut, bruised and battered body … I ended up in a Newark jail. Could’ve gotten killed, or worse, killed others, several times that evening.

Jail … it was what I needed at that time to protect me from myself, Satan, and the world … it was the best place to think. And God really spoke to me. I finally listened and decided that life according to my instruction book … my kingdom come, my will be done mentality … wasn’t working. My hole kept getting deeper and deeper over a 10-year stretch. I finally understood what Jesus did for me, and what God wanted to do in my life … transform me and bless me with an abundant life by fulfilling all my needs. I started to really know, love, and delight in my Lord. I finally decided to make Him not just Savior, but also Lord of my life.

Well, it took me several years to sort it out and really appreciate that day, and now I look back and thank God so much for what He has done for and through me. My terrible memories of that one Super Bowl Sunday have been wiped clean with the blood of Christ. What He has blessed me with since then … spiritual growth, a loving wife, my girls, friends, profession, ministry, coworkers, experiences, has been beyond my wildest dreams, especially compared to being in jail facing felony charges. (Not wanting to test God, I always make sure I am in a safe place Super Sunday.)

Today, realize that each decision, regardless of how big or small it is, has definite ripples. Are you measuring the ripple effect? Second, if you are experiencing difficulties, hope is in the Lord, not in your efforts or abilities. Third, if you have done some terrible things in the past, God will forgive and help you move forward, using even those events in powerful ways to impact you, others, and His kingdom. Lastly, after accepting Christ as your personal Savior, make the defining decision of your life on Earth to let Him be the Lord of your life. That’s when life really comes alive and makes sense as it pushes you to connect fully with Him. Life is your decision, so choose well. And enjoy the game.

Prayer
Dear Father God, You, Your love, and grace are truly amazing. I thank You for not leaving me even though I left You many times. Thanks for landing me in jail, so I finally could block out all the distractions of life and meet You and listen to what You had been trying to tell me for many years. Thanks for the tremendous opportunity to serve You and for Your willingness to use me in Your service … it is truly humbling. I pray this in the name of the One I delight in, Jesus Christ; And all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him, and he will act.
Psalm 37:4

The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy. I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.
John 10:10

I appeal to you therefore, brothers, by the mercies of God, to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and acceptable to God, which is your spiritual worship. Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.
Romans 12:1-2

Stepping Stones: Are You” Super Bowling” Everyday Life?

February 3, 2012

Transformational Thought

Super Bowl Sunday has almost become a national holiday. It’s the most-watched TV show with 111 million viewers, taking in $2.8 million for a 30 second commercial, and it’s the biggest betting day of the year. On this day more employees “call-out-sick”, 1 billion wings are eaten, the most pizzas are ordered, and unfortunately, it’s the worst day for domestic violence.

The Super Bowl is an unbelievable event … so much emotion, buildup, and expectations. The winner is remembered and worshipped forever, and the loser is branded a choker… forever, or until they get back again and win. The commercials, halftime mega-shows, plays, players, and personalities are seared in our minds or become societal icons.

One Super Bowl a year is enough, just ask my wife. Can you imagine 2 a year, or one per month, or heaven forbid, weekly Super Bowls? We would be overwhelmed, on edge, emotionally spent, fed up, bankrupt, hung-over, and paralyzed.

But you see, life is the same way. We have “Super Bowl” events … meeting God, getting married, birthing a child, losing a loved one, starting day-1 on the dream job, having an affair, taking grand vacations, learning a child has a disability, starting school, helping a child leave for college, experiencing divorce, getting fired, coping with a natural disaster, 9/11. You get the idea … they don’t happen every week. Then we have some “playoff game” events whose immediate and long term impact are important but smaller. And some other life events rank on the very-important-regular-season-game level.

The reality: 99% of life is either a regular season game or even a preseason game in level of importance and impact. The problem: we react to many of our daily events as if they had the importance and impact of a Super Bowl or playoff game. To prove it to you, we forget these same events within 1-15 days. We can’t handle the emotional rollercoaster of 6 Super Bowls a year, let alone 3 Super Bowls a day. While only few people are “drama queens”, most people fall into the Super Bowl mentality trap. We erroneously feel many things in life are all-important and life-changing.

Patients, both male and female, tell me they have been impacted by one question I’ve asked, namely, “Does that event really rate the ‘Super Bowl‘ level of importance you are giving it?” The question really helps people gain a more eternal, realistic, and Godly perspective about everyday events.

Today, remember Super Bowl-magnitude events usually occur once or twice a year. Look at how you react to minor disruptions and ask yourself, “Is this situation really a Super Bowl event in magnitude and long term impact, or am I having an exaggerated response?” If you are inappropriately “Super Bowling” it, ask yourself “Why?” and “How often do I do this?” Parents, you’ll probably be amazed as you contemplate your reactions to your kid’s behavior. Life is your decision, so choose well.

Prayer
Dear Father God, thanks for being sovereign over all things … this truth, and my faith in Your sovereignty gives me such peace in most situations. I confess though, that sometimes I over-react to the spiritual warfare and minutiae of the day and blow it into a Super Bowl level of importance. Give me discernment and the Mind of Christ to realize what really is important and what isn’t. I pray this in the name of the greatest ‘Super Bowl’ event of all time, Jesus Christ’s death and resurrection; And all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
And which of you by being anxious can add a single hour to his span of life? If then you are not able to do as small a thing as that, why are you anxious about the rest?
Luke 12:25,26

And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body. And be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly, teaching and admonishing one another in all wisdom, singing psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, with thankfulness in your hearts to God. And whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.
Colossians 3:15-17

Stepping Stones: Darkness - Not Always Bad

January 4, 2012

Transformational Thought

Darkness is typically thought of as something negative, bad, and is oftentimes associated with evil. Nightfall, devoid of light, blackened, lost, secret, closed, blinded. The Bible often uses darkness to portray “not in God’s light”… a place we don’t want to be.

As a child, I was frightened of the dark. I saw so many westerns that I was afraid Indians might come in my room and burn me at the stake. Some people even carry these fears through their teens and into adulthood. But I have learned through personal experience that darkness is not all bad. And darkness does not have to be synonymous with the absence of God. Sometimes when darkness comes, it signifies that we are under the shelter and in the shadow of our Lord. (Psalm 91:1) Know that as children of God, nothing happens to you that He has not allowed.

During times of darkness, there are actually treasures to be found (Isaiah 45:3), along with learning and growth. When darkness comes, most people run from it and unfortunately don’t see God’s protection or the lessons God has for them. Others distract or soothe themselves from the uneasiness of the darkness by turning to food, fear, alcohol, porn, power, control, anger, or other patently knee jerk responses. Some simply sleep through it as if nothing is happening.

When events don’t go our way and we feel emotionally uncomfortable, our natural reaction is to assume the situation is against us. We then believe nothing positive can come from it, even though we know from experience with school, sports, or the arts that we have to practice to get good results. The “no pain, no gain” maxim is true for spiritual growth as well. When we are born again, we aren’t totally mature, fully-equipped believers. Spiritual transformation is a process involving work, effort, self-reflection, self-examination, learning from mistakes, and applying our new skills and relationship in times of adversity.

Today, when you find yourself in the midst of physical and spiritual darkness, turn to your God for strength. Don’t run. Rather, look for the treasures in those secret places. While in the dark, turn to His Presence…His Word…His Spirit. And you will soon see His Lighthouse guiding you step by step. Look for how He wants to grow or strengthen you, especially in the areas you need of your life that are holding you back. Always search for the positives in the storm, because they always are there. Your decision, so choose well.

Prayer
Dear Father God,I know that You are perfect in all Your ways…therefore it is impossible for You to be careless. Nothing happens to me that You have not allowed. When I experience times of darkness – times that You could have prevented – it sometimes feels as if You are being careless with me. Thanks for always having a plan for my growth and success, and giving me courage to follow Your perfect plan instead of my inadequate one. I pray, Father, that You equip me to navigate in the darkness…and that You will teach me how to use that equipment. I pray this in the name of the One You sent who experienced the darkest of times while paying for my sins, Jesus Christ; And all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
I will give you the treasures of darkness, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am the LORD, the God of Israel, who summons you by name.
Isaiah 45:3

So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
Isaiah 41:10

He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
Psalm 91:1

Stepping Stones: Eternity With One or One-Night Stands With Many?

January 3, 2012

Transformational Thought

Once in a while I hear a question or a statement that makes God, Jesus, and Christianity so real, so concrete, so clear. An example is a question a patient asked me, “Who do you think Jesus Christ really was?” Based on what Jesus claimed, only 2 choices really exist, 1. He was honest and therefore is the Son of God and Savior of all mankind…or, 2. He was a liar or a madman and what He said isn’t true. In the Case for Christ, Lee Strobel does a great job examining this very question.

You see there really isn’t any in-between answer to this question. Based on who He said He was, either you believe Him or not. If you don’t believe He is the Son of God, then His claims are lunacy. In fact, as a psychiatrist, I have had to pursue or uphold an involuntary commitment to an in-patient psychiatric unit for some delusional or manic individuals who made claims and firmly believed themselves to be God, Jesus, the Antichrist, a select and powerful angel, or the Chosen One.

So, I will ask you a similar question. Do you believe in the eternity promised by God and delivered by Jesus Christ? If your answer is yes, then I say Halleluiah! If your answer is no…well then, life must feel like a continuous series of one-night stands. Essentially, you are running from person to person, object to object, and event to event, engaged in a mad quest to find happiness, value, and connection…the desires of your heart. But without God you are coming up empty, then eagerly going to the next hot prospect. Disappointment prevails. You know the frustration and letdown of one-night stands: momentary highs followed by heartache and rejection. On-going chasing and coming up short...just constant teases…never the deep, lasting romance we crave. How sad is that?

Even as Christians, we still fall prey to this courting merry-go-round. Why do we stray? We mistakenly believe we can find joy and fulfillment through material substitutes leaving God out of the equation.

Today, think of spending your days as a string of commitments that lead up to God’s promise of eternity. Make God your exclusive God by choosing a life-long commitment to Him and His truth. When you are all-in with Him, He delivers the desires of your heart and you won’t waste time on one-night stands. I lived that life of one-night stands and wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy. Your decision, so choose well.

Prayer
Dear Father God, Most of my life has been a string of disjointed pursuits. I had no beliefs in fulfillment through anything outside myself, and never thought I would change. But today, Lord, by Your Grace, I’ll try and build each day upon the one before it, all with the expressed purpose of pleasing You…reveling in the peace and power of Your promises and Word…anticipating spending eternity with You. Help me keep this focus, Lord. I pray in the name of the One You sent to deliver eternity to me, Jesus Christ; And all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
Your word, O LORD, is eternal; it stands firm in the heavens.
Psalm 119:89

Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.
Psalm 37:4

so that, just as sin reigned in death, so also grace might reign through righteousness to bring eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.
Romans 5:21

Stepping Stones: Guarantee: Time Passes –So What Will You Do?

January 1, 2012

Transformational Thought

Happy New Year! Seems like Y2K was just a couple years ago with all the commotion about streetlights going crazy…retirement funds being depleted…financial chaos emerging from Wall Street…water and food being unavailable…people reserving generators over one year in advance. Then came 9/11 and the crash of the economy. Wow! The first years of the new century have blown by so fast.

I’ve never met anyone who thinks time has passed slowly. Really, the only thing we are guaranteed in this world (assuming the Rapture doesn’t happen yet) is this…Time Passes! Unless you die, time methodically marches on. And as we’ve noted…time moves very quickly, stopping for no one.

So here’s my point…putting together the above observations: we are guaranteed that Jan. 1, 2013 will come, and actually be here very quickly. I’m just preparing you for the inevitable truth. Now comes the question you need to ask yourself, “Do I want to be in the same position, shoes, state of mind, level of psychological and spiritual maturity on Jan. 1, 2013 that I am in now? Do I want to have the same degree of impact on family, friends and society? Or do I want more from myself and life?” We all want to grow. In fact, God commands us to mature…to go from milk to solid food. Staying the same isn’t an option. If you aren’t going forward and growing, then you are going backward. Life is much easier and way more fulfilling when we are growing in God and life.

First, growth starts when you set a goal. Second, to get to your destination, you have to realize where you are starting from. And third, you need to develop a strategy that takes you from where you are now to your goal. To make growth happen, self-reflection and assessment are essential keys. New Year’s Eve is the time most of us look back and evaluate, but it really is hard to appraise one whole year in a just a few hours. That’s just a lazy and shortsighted shortcut. Think about it, you didn’t get this way overnight, so you can’t assess it and adequately troubleshoot it in just a few hours.

Today, most of you have a day off, so take time to invest in yourself. Write down who you want to be on 1/1/13. Be very descriptive about your spiritual, emotional, relational and thinking world. Then commit to 15-30 minutes per day for the next month for serious self-reflection/assessment and some concrete journaling. Your return on this small investment will be truly life changing. You see, this was one of the first steps of my life transformation. WITHIN REACH will give you a unique and powerful strategy to quickly, efficiently, and deeply assess yourself and bring dramatic, powerful growth to all areas of your life. Your decision, choose well.

Prayer
Dear Father God, You are so Holy and amazing, and I am in awe. Thank You for not giving up on me, a sinner, and then actually coming alongside me, to bear my yoke, be my Counselor, and grow me to be more Christ-like. I know You want to finish the work You started and have promised You will. Show me how to use your Holy Spirit, your instruction, and the understanding of who You are to transform my mind and life. I pray in the name of the One who started this transformational revolution, Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.
Philippians 1:6

I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called,
Ephesians 4:1

For if anyone is a hearer of the word and not a doer, he is like a man who looks intently at his natural face in a mirror. For he looks at himself and goes away and at once forgets what he was like. But the one who looks into the perfect law, the law of liberty, and perseveres, being no hearer who forgets but a doer who acts, he will be blessed in his doing.
James 1:23-25

All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, that the man of God may be competent, equipped for every good work.
2 Timothy 3:16,17

Stepping Stones: Only One Resolution Needed

December 31, 2011

Transformational Thought

So many of us use New Year’s Eve and Day to make resolutions … to try and “fix” our shortcomings … to focus on our failures. So many resolutions are made … and within a few days or weeks, they are broken. To keep a resolution for a whole month is virtually unheard of in our society.

Remember, the world we live in is fallen and we are part of that brokenness. In this fallen world, all our default settings are tainted by sin. Trying to “fix” yourself, by yourself, is futile. It’s like trying to put all the pieces of a broken mirror back together to get a true reflection. Only one New Year’s resolution is needed … to develop the Mind of Christ. Growing closer to God, yearning for Him, then glorifying Him with your internal heart and external behavior.

Developing the Mind of Christ can’t happen without the Holy Spirit. If you aren’t saved, (often called born again), and haven’t received God’s gift of Jesus as your personal Savior to save you from the penalty for your sins, then click here to learn how to be saved to go to heaven for eternity. If you are saved, then learning how to access the power of the Holy Spirit is the way to achieve your resolution and grow the Mind of Christ – to glorify God, achieve your God-given potential and enjoy the peace and fulfillment only Jesus brings. WITHIN REACH: Disciplines for Real Life Changeis our decision-making and growth workshop that covers confession, the armor of God, biblical truths, and a strategy to understand and apply the Holy Spirit’s work in the everyday decisions of life.

To make a resolution is to make a decision with intention and determination … a decision with firmness of mind and purpose. When the Spirit is in you, and you are obeying and following Him, you will be transformed and renewed. The Holy Spirit will give you incredible motivation to follow through with your resolution.

Today, if you have not yet believed in Jesus Christ as your personal Savior, that is the major way to transform your life right now. If you have accepted Christ as your Savior, the next step is to make the only resolution that can truly make a difference in your life. Decide to move closer to God and access the Holy Spirit to transform your mind and life ... now and for eternity. Tomorrow, we will look closer at transformation. But you need to be intentional now. Your decision, choose well.

Prayer
Dear Father God, on this New Year’s Eve, I make the only resolution that counts … to move closer to You by achieving the “Mind of Christ.” In New Year’s Eves of the past, I have defaulted to try and problem solve through resolutions, always trying to find out what was wrong … and then trying to “fix” things my way. I come to You, Father, and ask for Your grace and collaboration to set me free from all my hurtful, sinful ways. I will view each moment in this New Year and all the years to come as a fresh opportunity to draw ever closer to You. I pray in the name of the One you sent to transform me and give me new life, Jesus Christ; and all the children of the world say - AMEN!

Truth
And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable and perfect.
Romans 12:2

to put off your old self, which belongs to your former manner of life and is corrupt through deceitful desires, and to be renewed in the spirit of your minds, and to put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in true righteousness and holiness.
Ephesians 4:22-24

Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.
Psalm 51:10

Stepping Stones: The 60/60 Rule

December 30, 2011

Transformational Thought

Yes, that big snowstorm did hit, 8-12 inches here, and we lost power for almost 48 hours, so the weathermen get some extra grace. As I was driving through our quaint little borough, everybody was hard at work clearing small branches that had broken off and whole trees that had collapsed under the weight of the snow, and so many people were out shoveling their own walks and driveways as well as the public sidewalks.

Watching this, I was reminded of the old rule I learned as a kid from my grandfather while mowing his lawn, the 60/60 rule. You might know it by a different name, but it goes something like this. When doing some work next to a property line, don’t just work up to the property line, work past the line and do some of your neighbor’s property. The other application is when you are working with someone in a project, don’t just complete 50% each, but try to do 60% each. When both parties have this mentality, the job or project is more enjoyable, and the relationship flourishes.

You see, while 60/60 has many advantages, our natural tendency is to just do our own and stop at 50/50. If you operate under the 50/50 rule, meaning, you do your part and I’ll do mine, not any more than you have to, many things fall between the cracks. When people shoot for the 50% mark they may cut a few corners and unintentionally fall short…or purposely act a little stingy. When I do 60%, I am ensuring an overlap so that nothing falls through the crack. If we both do 60%, we can guarantee nothing falls through the crack.

How thankful we should be that God doesn’t just give 50% or even 60%. He gave 100% for our salvation, and then continues giving and forgiving 100%…over and over…extending more and accepting the small percentage that we offer back.

I never see the Bible say, “Well, just meet them half way.” In fact, Jesus says we are to die to ourselves. That sounds like we need to be in 100%.

Today, think about the difference it would make in your life if you and those around you followed the 60/60 rule. Go ahead, give 60% today, and see what happens. Think about doing 60% instead of your half of the work…paying 60% of the dinner check…accepting 60% of the blame for that fractured relationship. Now, how about with God? Can you give more in gratitude for the 100% He sacrificed for you? Your decision, so choose well.

Prayer
Dear Father God, I admit, Father, that I am often guilty of not doing my fair share, not taking my fair share of the blame…and letting things “fall through the cracks.” I pray, Lord, that you will fill me with Your Spirit so that I have the strength and mindset to always do more than my fair share. I pray this in the name of the One who always gave His 100%, Jesus Christ; And all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
And all that believed were together, and had all things common; and sold their possessions and goods, and parted them to all men, as every man had need. And they, continuing daily with one accord in the temple, and breaking bread from house to house, did eat their meat with gladness and singleness of heart, Praising God, and having favor with all the people. And the Lord added to the church daily such as should be saved.
Acts 2:44-47

But a Samaritan, as he journeyed, came to where he was, and when he saw him, he had compassion. He went to him and bound up his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he set him on his own animal and brought him to an inn and took care of him. And the next day he took out two denarii and gave them to the innkeeper, saying, 'Take care of him, and whatever more you spend, I will repay you when I come back.'
Luke 10:33-35