Stepping Stones: Are You An Oreo Believer?

Transformational Thought

I remember life as a teenager, everything seemed so simple. Authority was always corrupt or out of touch. Parents were always an obstacle to my pursuing the good life. Money was the answer to having a successful life. Pink was a girl color I would never wear. Rock-n-Roll was the only music worth listening to. The popular girl would never go out with you because you weren’t cool.

With political elections coming up, the same black and white thinking is everywhere. Both sides will use those “always” and “never” words and make everything so extreme. One developmental milestone we all need to master is the ability to integrate good and bad in the same entity. Like an Oreo, black and white need to be seen together to see the whole picture, because nothing exists that doesn’t nave an upside and a downside to it.

There are two sides to being a believer; one of light and one of darkness. As a believer myself, I spend most of my spiritual energy on the “light” side of things. The promise of salvation, the grace and mercy of our Father, the power of forgiveness are just a few of the “light” elements. But to be a “Whole” believer we need to accept the dark side as well. We must believe that Satan, the Prince of Darkness, is as real as Jesus. It’s an ugly, scary fact. I bristle at even having to write about him. However, we need to know and believe that Satan’s primary mission now for existing is to thwart God’s plan by separating us from Christ.

Be clear, each day, especially for believers and followers of Christ, we are embroiled in diabolical spiritual warfare. Satan not only wants your attention, he wants your soul, your family, your job, your relationships. He wants it all. His strategy is to create constant confusion and distraction in your mind. This confusion attacks every sphere…your brain chemistry, your emotions and personality, your relationships with others, with Satan’s primary goal being to disrupt our relationship with God. God calls us to renew our mind, not destroy it, but your mind is where the battle wages.

Today, become a “Whole” believer, integrate the light and the dark by accepting and being aware that there is a never-ending war between God and Satan, and the trophy is your soul. Identify a negative thought pattern that smudges your lenses, and instead, look at Christ’s teachings for the truth. Remember, when you are stressed, the enemy isn’t your spouse, boss, money, your job, or anyone else…it is always Satan.

Prayer
Dear Father God, My focus is on You, my Lord. I believe and accept Your promise. I thank You for sending Your Son Jesus so that our sins may be forgiven. But I believe there is this diabolical creature, Satan. Your word tells us of his desire for death and destruction. I reject Satan and all his works. Help me, Father, to be aware, minute by minute, of this spiritual battle that wages around me. Help me remember that Satan tries to push my fleshly buttons, trying to tempt me to believe his lies about You. Thank You for a process to renew my mind, biologically, psychologically, socially, and spiritually by sending Jesus and giving us your instruction book, the Bible. I pray in the name of Your Son, the True Light of world, Jesus Christ; and all God’s people said – AMEN!

The Truth
He who does what is sinful is of the devil, because the devil has been sinning from the beginning. The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the devil's work. No one who is born of God will continue to sin, because God's seed remains in him; he cannot go on sinning, because he has been born of God.
1 John 3:8-9

Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.
Ephesians 6:11-12

Stepping Stones: Striving For Perfection Makes Me More Imperfect

Transformational Thought

Writing these devotionals is so enjoyable and such a blessing to us in so many ways. One aspect is the comments and feedback we get from you all which are so powerfully encouraging and exciting, as we get to see daily, what God is doing through us in your lives. Being able to partner with God, I am still amazed He would want to use us when He is so powerful to do it all on His own, is so exhilarating and purpose-giving. Stepping Stones has also been incredibly enriching to me as it pushes me to dig into God’s word regularly and deeper to articulate His truth to someone else.

Unfortunately, like all gifts and provisions from God in this world, there is a down side. Not necessarily from God, but through Satan’s schemes and my flesh or me-centered nature, what God meant for good, gets corrupted.

You see, I want to say so much about each Transformational Thought, so it’s not just a great feel-good message, but really practically equips you to Iive the life God wants for you that very day. Being a psychiatrist, I also want to equip you with some very practical tips to actually do something that day that will improve the faulty life patterns we all fall into or improve the strategies you have in fighting against Satan’s strategies. Then I need to package this 4-5 pages of content into a couple of paragraphs, or people don’t read it when it is too long!

Well, being an engineer, I am a perfectionist, and Satan uses that character flaw to try and suck the joy and excitement out of the blessing of being used by God to impact others. I’ve already written this one a couple times, wanting to be precise, impactful, catchy, brief, and practical. Why? Unfortunately at times, it’s more about my issues, and not as much about seeking and serving God well. I really have to be intentional to not fall in that trap. It’s important to remember that we live in a fallen world; a world that is so far from normal because it is tainted by sin. So much failure and frustration result from our seeking perfection in this life.

Today, remember that your yearning for perfection is not a bad thing in and of itself. Know that God placed that yearning in our hearts, so we would search for Him and not for it being about ourselves. When you push for perfection, is it for your image and driven by the opinions of others, or is it really for God. Most of the time, God would be fine with just 80% in most areas and we spend the other 20% on Him. Remember Mary and Martha, which one are you?

Prayer
Dear Father God, I know, Father, that my heart and soul contains many ill effects of the fall. As a result of this I often try and achieve perfection apart from You. This sets me down a path of frustration, insecurity, inadequacy, and failure. I sadly admit, Father, that this wrong path also included some form of idolatry in worshipping myself, other’s opinions, or the task itself. I want to return to You Lord…to the path that leads me to You. I will do this, Lord, by seeking You first and foremost. As I seek You, Father, I know You will set my feet on the right Stepping Stone…that You will give me a firm place to stand and the guidance to take the right next step. Help my search for perfection, point me to You. I pray in Jesus’ perfect name; and all God’s people said – AMEN!

The Truth
He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear and put their trust in the LORD.
Psalm 40:2-3

that by any means possible I may attain the resurrection from the dead. Not that I have already obtained this or am already perfect, but I press on to make it my own, because Christ Jesus has made me his own. Brothers, I do not consider that I have made it my own. But one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead,
Philippians 3:11-13

Now as they were traveling along, He entered a village; and a woman named Martha welcomed Him into her home. She had a sister called Mary, who was seated at the Lord’s feet, listening to His word. But Martha was distracted with all her preparations; and she came up to Him and said, “Lord, do You not care that my sister has left me to do all the serving alone? Then tell her to help me.” But the Lord answered and said to her, “Martha, Martha, you are worried and bothered about so many things; but only one thing is necessary, for Mary has chosen the good part, which shall not be taken away from her.”
Luke 10:38-42

Stepping Stones: Illness Throws Us Off Track

Transformational Thought

About four years ago I lost my brother Allen to cancer. Long before his illness, Allen worked daily to achieve the mind of Christ. Directly following his diagnosis a massive prayer effort developed. A daily prayer with relevant scripture was sent via email to thousands…this internet prayer movement was the forerunner to the current Stepping Stones Daily devotional.

When a loved one falls gravely ill, it’s a natural response to pray for their healing…at times, I almost demanded his healing from God, citing scripture about Jesus the healer…about “ask and you shall receive”. For the entire 22 months he battled this awful disease, Allen and his family believed he would be healed. We were pounding prayers to heaven requesting and often demanding Allen’s healing.

I know we missed the mark with our prayers for Allen.

How presumptuous we were. We actually believed we could change God’s mind and plan for Allen. I believe now, based on my learning, growth, and the perspective of other Christians, we should have been praying to align ourselves with the will of God. To pray that God’s wisdom, comfort, and peace are received by Allen and his family…and for us , too. And ultimately, to pray that we lessen our grip on needing Allen to be cured and strengthen our grip on being close to our Lord. This allows us to release Allen into God’s care, keeping, timing, and plan.

While Allen agonized over leaving his wife and 5 children here on earth, in the end, Allen was excited about meeting his Lord and God. In fact, he was ready, as he certainly was as prepared as anyone could be to meet his Father, our Creator.

The prayer movement took on a life of it’s own. Bringing prayer and the Word of God to so many who had never prayed before, as it truly changed many lives. People actually came to accept Christ as their Savior as God worked on their heart through these prayers. Allen would love to read the responses that came in from the prayer group, and he said before he died; “If somehow my illness delivers even one soul to God…it’s all been worth it.”

Today, think about yourself or someone who is ill now or was in the past. What did you pray for and what should you be praying for? It is so hard for us, when we are in pain or see others in pain, to still keep our eyes fixed on God and obedient to His plan. Ask yourself, “How, through this stressor, can I see the opportunity God has presented for me to see Him more clearly, and for others to see Him through me more clearly?” That question should guide some of your prayers through that trying time.

Prayer
Dear Father God, I pray today for all the sick and injured loved ones and friends of this Stepping Stones prayer community. I pray that you infuse the sick with Your Holy Spirit to give them hope and strength. I ask Your peace and comfort You offer to them to be received in full. , that they might have spiritual and psychological relief during their physical struggle. I pray, Father, that they seek to understand and align their thoughts and prayers with Your Will and Your timing…for Your timing is perfect, Father. I pray that You will reveal to those suffering, as well as their caregivers, the meaning and purpose of these trials. I pray, Father, that You guide the minds and hands of all the medical professionals so that they do Your work as they apply their skills to the sick and injured. Help those who are terminally ill to understand that Your healing for them may in fact be delivered on the other side of this temporal life. Help them and all of us believe in You so that we will see Your glory. I pray this in the name of our healing savior Jesus Christ; and all God’s people said – AMEN!

The Truth
Then Jesus said, "Did I not tell you that if you believed, you would see the glory of God?"
John 11:40
Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.
John 14:27

Stepping Stones: “God’s Love Comes From Everywhere”

Transformational Thought

I know, today’s title sounds like a Sunday School cliché, but I want to share a childhood memory that will hopefully bring it new meaning, and lots of hope.

I’m one of 14 children, all from the same mother and father. That was a generation thing because you don’t see that too often in this generation. Our mother, with so many stressors and potential obstacles, always displayed such a deep Christ-based faith. Being one of the oldest kids, I had the opportunity, no, the blessing to witness my mother living out her faith through so many of her life’s storms. She was always sure to point out the abundant grace our financially poor family received as a direct result of God’s love. She would tell her children often; “God’s love comes from everywhere.”

I was 8 years old and already had 7 siblings. My father was in the hospital due to a chronic heart condition. There had been no money coming into the household for a month or longer. I don’t know how mom provided for us. No food stamps or welfare. Our credit had run out at the small town grocery store. Some friends brought food for us, but not often.

On this particular evening it was dinnertime and I knew there was no food in the house – nothing. I was hungry, but more concerned for my younger brothers and sisters. I went to my mom and let her know (as if she didn’t already know) that we had no food for dinner. “What are you going to do?” I asked. I saw the sadness and nervousness in her eyes. But with head up and shoulders back, she said with confidence; “I don’t know right now, but I know God will provide for us.” I believed her, because I saw God work like this in the past.

A few minutes later there was a knock on our door. When I answered, no one was there…but they had left a bushel basket of food – ham, bread, fruit, potatoes…it was overflowing. On top was an envelope with the words; “God’s love comes from everywhere.” Inside the envelope was $500 cash. Without Dad’s illness, I would never have got this lesson, and that is a whole ‘nother devotional and principle.

Often we overlook the grace and love that God extends, abundantly, to us each and everyday. When we recently discussed envy, we explored why we scrutinize what we don’t have, and overlook what God has given us.

Today, try and look for God’s love. The breath you take, the ability to read this devotional, technology to get this email, relationships with Stepping Stones and the many people in your life, the opportunity to hear about God daily and freely, all the basics of life we take for granted each day. It comes from everywhere. It’s your decision, dwell on what you do have, or what you don’t. Choose well.

Prayer
Dear Father God, I thank You for Your constant love and grace. I thank You for allowing me to see You at work throughout my mother’s life. Help me remember that when I am at my weakest, I am at my strongest, through Your power. As my mother was, I too want to be available to help You display Your power and glory to others. I know that my weakness is the ideal stage for the exhibition of Your Power. In Jesus’ perfectly humble and powerful name; and all God’s people said, -AMEN!

The Truth
But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me.
2 Corinthians 12:9

Stepping Stones: Are You in Denial?

Transformational Thought

A while back, I was caught by surprise, but learned something very important, so let me share it with you. I was shopping at my favorite butcher shop when the butcher asked: “could I ask you a personal question?” I have always exchanged pleasantries with this guy, but now he had a serious question. I said “sure.” He asked; “Where do you get your source of happiness…you are always smiling.”

I knew exactly where I get my source of happiness and joy, but I was caught off guard. So I gave him a lame answer; “Happiness is a choice…I choose to be happy.” I could tell he was disappointed in my answer.

Wow, so was I. Did that really just pop out of my mouth? It was as if someone was asking me if I know Jesus, and I was denying my association with Jesus. I can’t believe I was being like Peter and denying my Lord so blatantly.

A few days following that encounter I was reading 1 Peter and came across 3:15 where we are instructed to always be ready to give a defense to everyone who asks you a reason for the hope that is in you. I went back to the butcher the next day and told him that I didn’t give him the quality response that his question deserved. I told him in front of listening customers that my happiness and joy comes from living within the hope and promise of salvation…the salvation made possible by Jesus Christ. I told him I was a struggling Christian, and then I asked him about his relationship with God.

It’s rare for someone to ask such a direct question of us, but when they do, scripture tells us to be ready. We are more ready when we see God in all things. You see I am trying to grow my awareness, my spiritual radar, to see God in all aspects of my life, 24/7. When we only connect with Him on Sunday, or before meals, or when we really need His help during stormy times, then we will only see Him as a small accessory in our life. The reality, He is our life and in all facets of our life. We can’t escape Him, nor would we ever want to.

Today, think how you might respond when someone asks you the reason for the hope within you. Can you articulate to yourself the impact your faith and God’s actions have in your daily, moment-to-moment living. This is what we need to show and tell others. Your decision, choose well.

Prayer
Dear Father, I come to you with a thankful heart. I recognize Your Son, Jesus Christ, as my Lord and I trust Him for the strength I so desperately need to lead a God-pleasing life. Help me, Lord, to not be speechless when called upon to defend my faith and to spread Your message of forgiveness, faith, love and hope. Help me do so with gentleness and respect. Help me, Lord, to be a lighthouse for those in need. I pray with the authority granted to me through Jesus Christ; and all God’s people said – AMEN!

The Truth
In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.
Matthew 5:16

But sanctify the Lord God in your hearts, and always be ready to give a defense to everyone who asks you a reason for the hope that is in you, with meekness and fear;
1 Peter 3:15

Stepping Stones: What Eats At Your Stomach?

Transformational Thought

As a teenager, sports was my life. God blessed me with some raw talent and I worked hard so I ended up being pretty good and earned 9 High School Varsity letters. Even with all the athletic success, I would have difficulty sleeping the nights before most games. My stomach would also get tied up and I would have gastrointestinal distress during the couple hours before game time.

That gnawing feeling in the pit of your stomach that keeps you awake at night or has you running to the bathroom before a game, it’s all about fear and doubt. We all are insecure and feel inadequate. That’s the way we are born as we are separated from God. God provides the answer for our fear, doubt, insecurity, and inadequacy. We need to take that answer, and put it up on a shelf in the attic and use it only in heaven, right?

WRONG! We need to take that answer from God and apply it in all the areas of our life. No matter what the fear or doubt, even though we feel life is closing in, there is always a way out. Just because you don’t know it, doesn’t mean there isn’t one. The best way to position yourself to see the way out, is to choose to feed on His faithfulness. When you’re feeding on His faithfulness, it’s hard to feed on doubt, fear, or unbelief.

Today, stop from giving any more time to anxiety, fear and doubt. Recall a problem in the recent past, that in the moment of the acute crisis, you saw no solution and there was no help on the horizon. You might even thought, “It’s all over.” Whatever that means. Then, a little time later, an answer, solutions, help, or the calvary shows up. We all have situations that in retrospect, started out hopeless, but then God did amazing things. It is important to identify and recall those times, as they are examples of God’s faithfulness and sovereignty and our finiteness. You know how you were told while you were growing up to starve a fever and feed a cold, well it’s time to starve your unbelief and feed on His faithfulness. Your decision, choose well.

Prayer
Dear Father God, I thank You Father for Your Word, which gives me hope, peace, and joy. I have been feeding on all the wrong stuff. I have been feeding on negativity, worry…doom and gloom. My mind spins out of control…especially when I try to sleep. Help me, my Lord, to feed on Your faithfulness. Help me build myself up on Your most holy faith, Lord. Help me practice the patience You are building in me through Your Holy Spirit to wait for Your timing and not demand mine. I pray through the Holy Spirit and in the name of the most faithful One, Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say – AMEN!

The Truth
Trust in the LORD, and do good; dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness.
Delight yourself also in the LORD, And He shall give you the desires of your heart.
Psalm 37:3-4

But you, beloved, building yourselves up on your most holy faith, praying in the Holy Spirit
Jude 1:20

Stepping Stones: What Is Your Return On Investment?

Transformational Thought

Few things give me goosebumps like when my kids are involved in plays, recitals, or sports, and I see all their effort pay off in that amazing performance. With joy, pride, and self-confidence oozing from their faces and bodies, I will often even cry. I am always amazed at how well these youngsters perform out there in front of the big crowd with all the pressure. And they do it mostly on their own, often with minimal or no adult involvement. How is this possible?

The answer: They are instructed in the fundamentals of the task, then practice them over and over, in safe, nonthreatening situations, till the task becomes second nature. Then, after all those investments…of time, effort, embarrassment, humility, trust in the coach, self-discipline, delayed gratification, dealing with mistakes, perseverance…the big night comes with pressure, potential adversity, judgment, and a lot on the line. The more deposits that were made during the preparation phase, the grander the reward when it’s showtime. That is success, with interest. In these difficult economic times, there’s no safe place to put your savings, that also pays interest.

Practice trusting in Your Lord during the quiet days. In the mundane, everyday situations, see God at work, trust in His character and promises, see how He is meeting your needs and caring for you, and communicate with Him regularly. Remember, communication is praying and listening. Then when your storms come (and they will), your trust-balance will be sufficient to see you through. In fact, you will shine brightly, like the star in a play. You will also go to Him more easily in time of need, because you’ve been regularly practicing.

Today, try making a deposit in His treasury. Praying, listening to God, looking for Him in your daily activities, spending time in His instruction manual, thanking Him for what you have, or describing His character and how those attributes affect how you see and navigate your day. The list can be endless. Each time you affirm your trust in Him, it is like putting a coin into His treasury. In doing so you build up equity to be able to draw against it stormy days. He will keep safely in His heart all investments in Him…with interest compounded continuously. The more you trust in God, the more He will enable you to do so, and the easier it will be to trust Him during the storms.

Prayer
Dear Father God, I know that the only safe investment is in You. I have tried saving money for security but have lost it all. Help me, Father, turn to trusting You. I see now how my faith and trust in you can grow exponentially. I have seen firsthand that the more I trust You, the more You enable me to trust you even more. Thank you for this Upward-Spiral. I pray with trust and confidence through my savior Jesus Christ, and all God’s people said – Amen!

The Truth
Whenever I am afraid, I will trust in You. In God (I will praise His word), In God I have put my trust; I will not fear. What can flesh do to me?
Psalm 56:3-4

but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal.
Matthew 6:20

Stepping Stones: Is Your Body Coordinated

Transformational Thought

Try this little exercise…Close your eyes (after you are done reading this), then put your arms straight out in front of you (just like a zombie pose). What saves you from falling on your face? Your ugly, smelly BIG TOE! We all need a big toe or we would fall on our face.

But if our body was only big toes and we had no eyes, we wouldn’t see the couch and would stub our big toe constantly. Without a stomach or heart, our foot muscles get no nutrition to use the big toe. We need all our body parts working together in the amazing way God created. Well, God also described another body, the church, and the body parts are us believers. Like the human body, to maximize our functioning which is to glorify God, the body parts need to work together, communicating with and supporting each other. Just like physical coordination leads to athletic success, we need to have some spiritual body coordination to have spiritual impact and success.

Stepping Stones started Feb. 19, 2009, and we sent out 650 devotionals. In 20 months since, we’ve sent 1,100,000 devotionals This morning, 2700 people will get Stepping Stones from us directly and another 1500(possibly more) get it from you emailing it, printing it out, or using it in prison ministry, small groups, or with patients you counsel. We then have thousands more who get it from various church or other organizational websites or you sharing it on Facebook for your friends to see. Thank you for spreading the Word.

You send us amazing comments, which greatly encourage and enrich us, but we want the rest of this Stepping Stones community to also benefit from your encouragement and words of wisdom to help us in our storms. This is how the body of believers can work more synergistically together as we help each other spiritually mature.

Today, to facilitate this community growth both in depth and numbers, we ask you to consider a couple options: 1. click the “Stepping Stones Blog Community” link in the left margin(www.SteppingStones-LN.blogspot.com) and you can post a comment (anonymously if you want), read each other’s comments, and we can all benefit from collective wisdom, experiences, and perspectives, 2. Forward Stepping Stones to 10 people in your life with a note about how you care for them and how Stepping Stones has impacted you, 3. Hit the Facebook icon on the top of Stepping Stones and share it on Facebook so you can bless others. Don’t be shy as we are here to build each other up as Jesus modeled and God desires. We are built for relationship and need each other to help us grow, and by working together, spread the gospel message. These are free and easy steps to be a Lighthouse to those God has strategically put in your life. Then share the cool stories that God delivers in your life!

Prayer
Dear God, You are amazing and an awesome creator…the way You made my body with all the intricacies of my eyeball and brain…and the simplicity of my big toe. Thank you also for the body of believers You have created, with Christ as our head. I am sorry for how all the Christian churches don’t work together as one united body…it must grieve You so to see this body fractured. I thank You for and pray You strengthen this part of the church body, the Stepping Stones Community, as we encourage, teach, and care for each other to be Lighthouses shining Your glory, love, and grace to all who need it, and helping each other stand firm in the waves and storms of this world. Give us courage to reach out and be open about our love for You and thankfulness of having You in our life. We pray for open hearts for those that will be getting Stepping Stones for the first time through the sharing of our community. In Jesus’ name as the head of our body; and all God’s children say – AMEN!

The Truth
For as in one body we have many members, and the members do not all have the same function, so we, though many, are one body in Christ, and individually members one of another.
Romans 12:4,5

And he gave the apostles, the prophets, the evangelists, the shepherds and teachers,
to equip the saints for the work of ministry, for building up the body of Christ, until we all attain to the unity of the faith and of the knowledge of the Son of God, to mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ, so that we may no longer be children, tossed to and fro by the waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine, by human cunning, by craftiness in deceitful schemes. Rather, speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ, from whom the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love.
Ephesians 4:11-16

Stepping Stones: The Big Lie Behind Envy

Transformational Thought

We’ve spent the last 3 days examining, dissecting, I like to call it deconstructing, envy, and we pray it has been helpful and eye-opening for you. Most importantly though, we really hope this series has helped you grow in your understanding of God and yourself as well as move you some stepping stones closer to your goal of Christ-likeness. Not just Christ-like in theory, but actually in your everyday workings of your heart and evidenced by your works.

Today, in our last look at envy, we reveal the destructive belief, distortion, actually, a lie that both fuels envy and is magnified by envy. You see, when you envy someone’s possessions (we aren’t talking about the Godly traits or living that you see in someone else), what you’re really saying is “I am not content with what I have, I deserve more, that “fill in the blank” should be mine, not my neighbor’s.”

If God makes the decisions regarding who has what, the core belief of envy is, drum roll please, God made a mistake! He didn’t give me what I deserve…in fact, He gave it to someone else who doesn’t deserve it as much as I do.” If God really knows me, and loves me, He would give me what I want or “need”.

These distortions and lies are all part of Satan’s plot to make it seem like God isn’t interested in us, doesn’t love us, doesn’t want to help us, or is impotent and can’t help us. The lie draws us away from God, sabotages the relationship God desires with and from us, then pushes us to rely on ourselves.

Today, examine your beliefs about God. Ask yourself, “Am I envious about what others have?” “At times, do I get dissatisfied with what I have?” “Do I get mad at God for my circumstances?” “How often do I look to His instruction manual for answers to grow me so God can give me different circumstances?” Then look deeper and examine whether you truly believe God made a mistake, because if you have some dissatisfaction or envy, then you are believing that God made a mistake.

Prayer
Dear God, Your love and grace for me are magnificent. Thank You so much for being perfect in all ways. I confess at times that I see something another person has and wonder why I don’t have that…and at times I strongly resent that I don’t have it and believe I deserve one, or even his. I regret, I sadden You as You have given me so much to be grateful for and I am blowing all those gifts off and wishing for the one don’t have but think I need, but You know isn’t right for me at this stage of my development and skills. I yearn for a heart that seeks to grow, wants to change, and is willing to have the pain, in order to get the gain. God, I know You will share in that pain and provide peace and comfort, so help me be brave to step one Stepping Stone closer to the life that is within reach. In Jesus’ name I find true contentment and absolution; and all God’s children say Amen – AMEN!

The Truth
O LORD, you have searched me and known me!
You know when I sit down and when I rise up; you discern my thoughts from afar.
You search out my path and my lying down and are acquainted with all my ways.
Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O LORD, you know it altogether.
Psalm 139:1-4

Stepping Stones: Why More Isn’t Enough

Transformational Thought

Yesterday, we looked at the envy trap Satan sets to pull us away from God and derail us off the track to Christ-likeness. We hope you have been learning to be more content with God and what He gives you each day. Today, let’s look at why we are so susceptible, over and over, to this envy trap.

I remember to my first paycheck helping a neighbor roofer in middle school. It seemed like so much money, then 5.00/hr in high school, then 7.00/hr in college. In med school, I had so many bills and made 8000/yr parking cars to pay room and meals and that seemed like so much. But then the third and fourth years of med school, I would work 80-100 hrs/wk for NO pay. So when I started residency, I was 108,000 in debt, hadn’t had a paycheck in 2 years, moving to California with 2 suitcases of clothes to my name, and was desperate for money.

That first month, I made $3000. It seemed like a million. I felt so rich, thought it would last forever, believed I was in financial heaven. I was able to buy a TV and bed, and eat out occasionally. Well, 6 months later, I was amazed at how little I now had at the end of the month. I didn’t have enough. Residency year 2, I got a raise to 39,000/yr. Wow, I’m rich again. But in 5 months, I started to get that “It’s not enough” feeling. Year 4, I was making 45,000 and moonlighting to almost double that. Again, I felt rich, but in about 8 months I needed more. How could 36,000 seem so great, but then 90,000 for the same lifestyle not be enough. Our flesh is never satisfied.

Once we hit our goal, our mark, we reset or recalibrate to a higher setting, we need more for the same satisfaction. In addictions, we call it developing a tolerance, needing more of the drug to get the same effect. Needing more as time goes on happens in a lot of areas… money…space in a kitchen or yard…alcohol or caffeine…more out of marriage now than I said when engaged…job satisfaction…needing 2, 3, or 4 cars. Our amnesia to where the real settings need to be, and this recalibration phenomena, dangerously dangle us right over the envy trap.

Today, examine your needs meter. Have your settings been calibrated much higher than really necessary. Have your wants turned into needs? That is our flesh and Satan working in concert. Evaluate where God would set your needs meter, or, how Jesus set His. Examine and make a plan to back off one of your wants a bit today. Replace that with some time in God’s word or prayer time talking and listening to Him. Your decision, choose well.

Prayer
Dear Father, Thanks for meeting my needs. Help me understand the difference between real needs and desires, and be satisfied and thankful when You provide for my needs, instead of me saying “thanks, but I need more”. Help me focus on what I have and not on what I don’t have. God, You are so awesome and Your design is perfect, help me be transformed through Godly decision-making and not conformed to this world and mentality by my fleshly decisions. In Christ’s perfectly calibrated offering and name; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
See past 2 days scriptures as well.

The devil said to him, "If you are the Son of God, command this stone to become bread." And Jesus answered him, "It is written, 'Man shall not live by bread alone.'" And the devil took him up and showed him all the kingdoms of the world in a moment of time, and said to him, "To you I will give all this authority and their glory, for it has been delivered to me, and I give it to whom I will. If you, then, will worship me, it will all be yours." And Jesus answered him, "It is written, "'You shall worship the Lord your God, and him only shall you serve.'" And he took him to Jerusalem and set him on the pinnacle of the temple and said to him, "If you are the Son of God, throw yourself down from here, for it is written, "'He will command his angels concerning you, to guard you,' and "'On their hands they will bear you up, lest you strike your foot against a stone.'" And Jesus answered him, "It is said, 'You shall not put the Lord your God to the test.'"
Luke 4:3-12

Stepping Stones: What’s the Apple of Your Eye?

Transformational Thought

Yesterday, we introduced envy, which is wanting and sometimes craving what others have instead of getting our joy from being with God. Digging deeper today, envy is one of the traps Satan sets for us, using our pride, flesh, and satisfy-me-now mentality against us. Satan deceives us, he actually distorts our lenses, so we believe that our fulfillment and joy in this life come from emotional, psychological, physical, or material answers. His goal is getting us to close down our spiritual radar, turn off our spiritual antennae, and ignore spiritual, divine answers for our needs

In the Garden of Eden, Adam and Eve had this fantastic set up, direct relationship with the perfect God in the perfect setting and no adversity. But they weren’t omniscient and they were gullible (like us). Satan tricked them to believe they needed something, something in their life was missing. He duped them into thinking they needed more power and more knowledge, and could get all that through an apple (not as appealing as a steak). Instead of staying in relationship with and relying on God, Satan swindled them, trading eternal life with God for life on their own and separation from God. Thankfully God provided a way back into relationship with Him.

The trap, you see, is, if you believe your happiness and contentment are dependent on your external circumstances, or from someplace or someone else other than God, you will always be lost, unhappy, and discontent. Those things weren’t meant to bring you what you desire, nor can they. God designed us specifically to be immune to those external things, so regardless of our circumstances, or more importantly, the mistakes we make, financial, marital, parenting, sin, etc, that damage our circumstances, we still have access to a peace, comfort, and joy that is independent of who or what is around us.

Today, look inside and identify some of your traps…apples…that you have been tricked to believe will satisfy your real needs. How did you get tricked into believing they could deliver what you really desire, in the deepest places of your heart. Don’t mistake momentary relief for true fulfillment. It’s Satan’s trap! More on why envy seems endless tomorrow.

Prayer
Dear God, You and only You are the source of my joy, peace, and comfort. . I confess my need to control is the apple I grab for a lot. Help me grow in trust of Your control in my life and not have the need to trust my inadequate abilities. Please help me allow You to grow the eyes that see and ears that hear the traps Satan places in my path and choose the Stepping Stone You have for my movement forward to Christ-likeness. Strengthen me through Your Spirit to resist the temptations and impulses of my flesh so i don’t get trapped and again, have to ask Your forgiveness for my me-centered mistakes. But thanks for Your endless grace and forgiveness. In Jesus’ all providing death and resurrection I pray; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
But the serpent said to the woman, "You will not surely die. For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil."
So when the woman saw that the tree was good for food, and that it was a delight to the eyes, and that the tree was to be desired to make one wise, she took of its fruit and ate, and she also gave some to her husband who was with her, and he ate. Then the eyes of both were opened, and they knew that they were naked. And they sewed fig leaves together and made themselves loincloths.
Genesis 3:4-7

Stepping Stones: If I Could Win A Million Dollars…

Transformational Thought

I am amazed at all the “Hollywood Reports” news shows on TV. All the stories are about rich celebrities, with so much going for them, but in some kind of trouble. Tiger Woods’ affairs, Lindsay Lohan’s arrests, Charlie Sheen’s addictions, Heath Ledger’s suicides.

Some of the world’s most miserable people are those whose situation seems the most enviable. So as we watch these people, whether famous or even people in our community, we begin to think that joy and peace have to do with our circumstances. A better job, house, status, portfolio, or spouse is all we need to “find” happiness.

Time and again we see people who reach the top of the ladder, by society’s standards, only to find emptiness, stress, doubt, insecurity, fear, addictions, or chaotic behavior awaiting them. How often do people say, “If I just won a million dollars, my life would be perfect.” Thirty percent of lottery winners, more than one million dollars, within three years are dealing with divorce, financial struggle, health issues, legal or addiction problems, estrangement from family or kids, depression, or suicide. Our flesh always wants MORE!

God’s Holy Word tells us that we are not to set our desires on anything that belongs to others. Not only can these cravings make us miserable, they can lead us to other sins such as adultery, addiction, gossiping, or stealing.

True joy will never come by envying others. True Joy is a byproduct of living in the presence of God. Realizing He perfectly gives you exactly what you need, so focus on stewarding that well. Therefore you can experience true joy anywhere and in any circumstance; from palaces to prisons…anywhere.

Today, be mindful of envious thoughts and desires. Instead, concentrate on staying in communication with God. No need to be envious of anyone…after all the most precious and valuable possession is free and available to everyone; eternal life through Christ. Tune in tomorrow for more on envy’s trap.

Prayer
Dear Father God, I thank You for all the blessings and gifts You have given me. I know that You will provide everything I need, but Father, I confess of being envious of others and their possessions. Grow in me a heart and mind for the eternal kingdom and awareness of my spiritual needs, and less focused on my material and psychological answers that are short-sighted, quick fix solutions. Thank You, for being patient with me all these years, as I am a slow learner, but excited with what You are showing me in my life these last few years. In Jesus’ all-satisfying name we pray; and all God’s children say –AMEN!

The Truth
"You shall not covet your neighbor's wife. You shall not set your desire on your neighbor's house or land, his manservant or maidservant, his ox or donkey, or anything that belongs to your neighbor."
Deuteronomy 5:21

And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that always having all sufficiency in everything; you may have an abundance for every good deed
2 Corinthians 9:8

Stepping Stones: Know Him, Now Risk A Bit

Transformational Thought

As Christians we should be constantly striving to grow in Christ…to grow in our spiritual maturity. How do you grow spiritually? We all hear so many great sermons, read some good books, read the Word, but then what? What kind of strategy or disciplines do you practice daily so you will grow?

Unfortunately many Christians believe the answer to growth is more spiritual knowledge. But real growth comes with application of just a little knowledge. The first area of application needs to be getting to know and experiencing God. We should not confuse knowledge about Him with knowing Him experientially.

My wife is an outgoing, fun, generous, and caring person to hang out with and talk to. No matter how accurately I describe her, increasing your knowledge of her, even showing you home movies of her, you still wouldn’t really know her. Not until you actually spend time interacting with her in person, a number of times, actually sharing experiences with her, do you really start to get to know her.

The Bible is filled with messages about us needing power through His Holy Spirit. Power to grasp the vast magnitude of His Love – the Love that surpasses all understanding and knowledge. Knowing Him is so much more than storing facts and commentaries about Him in your memory banks.

Today, begin the process of knowing your Lord by first trusting Him. When you are uncomfortable, alone, anxious, sad, overwhelmed, frustrated…trust His promises to you. Then you will experience Him acting in your life and will really get to know Him. You got to put yourself out there a bit, just like you do in a real human relationship, when you are really trying to experience someone. Rely on your trust in Him, His promises, His character, His teachings. You’ve accumulated that knowledge of Him, now apply and act on it. Continue to live and communicate as if He is in your life, because He is! No matter what is happening, trusting Him then drawing close to Him are excellent ways to experience Him. Your decision, choose well!

Prayer
Dear Father God, You are such an awesome God. Who but You could be everywhere at all times. I am humbled and amazed that someone as great as You cares about every detail of my life. Help me, Lord, to keep You always before me. Help me not just know facts about You, but to let me experience You intimately. When I feel needy, Lord, help me run to You and not to other gods and things that I have used to replace You, other things that only give me temporary relief…and many times makes things oh so much worse. I pray this in the name of the One who knew me long ago, and still died for me, Jesus; and all God’s children say – AMEN!

The Truth
I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.
Ephesians 3:16-19

He gives power to the faint, and to him who has no might he increases strength.
Even youths shall faint and be weary, and young men shall fall exhausted; but they who wait for the LORD shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.
Isaiah 40:29-31

Stepping Stones: Are You Living For Today Or For Eternity?

Transformational Thought

A few years ago I lost my brother and best friend to cancer. Thankfully he had dedicated his life to following Christ years before his illness. Just before his death he looked at me as if he were looking right into my soul and asked me a very simple question: Have you ever really thought about eternity? I’ve been thinking about it ever since.

Many times we will hear Christians talk about life on earth compared to eternity. They would say “It’s as quick as the blink of an eye.” While our time on earth is certainly short and fast compared to eternity, how we spend that time determines how we will spend our eternity. Yes, our time on earth is very important and is just a small stepping stone on our path to our final destination, eternity.

When we don’t know Jesus, we make choices as if this life is all we have. In reality, this life is just the introduction the biggest part of life, eternity. And how we live this brief span will actually determine our eternal state and destination. What we accumulate in this life (material things) has no value in purchasing eternal life.

Today, try viewing all that happens from an eternal perspective. You should find both your values and your decisions changing. If you aren’t a believer in Jesus as your Savior, you got the biggest and most life altering decision to make that affects where and how you spend eternity. If you do believe in Christ, you will be in heaven for eternity. How amazing is awesome and impossible for me to fathom.

But, is how your living life now helping others realize the ultimate eternity determining decision they need to make. Sure, you might be a good person, but are your daily activities just making this earthly life more comfortable for you….or are you out there, in action and word, sharing the good news with others to affect eternal destinations.

This is what we are called to do, and God has put people in your life, today, for you to build deeper relationship with, ask more personal questions to, and today or soon, help them know their eternal options rest in Jesus. Be a Lighthouse! Your decision, choose well.

Prayer
Dear Father God, I come to You to praise You and give You glory. I come to You confessing that I do not have the eternal perspective that I want to have or should have. I thank You for my salvation and those You brought into my life who spoke to me about eternal things. I know Your Holy Spirit changes hearts and opens eyes, but I know You want to use me and I have a role to play in securing eternity in Your presence for others. Lord, please help me let go of all those things I cling to in this temporal world. As I release my grasp on those “things”, it frees my hand to reach out and take hold of Your hand as You guide me to help others understand the eternal home You have promised me and all believers. I pray, Father, that as I experience suffering and as I experience the storms of this temporal world, that You help me shift my focus to eternity…my ultimate destination. I pray this in the name of my ticket into eternity, Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say – AMEN!

The Truth
What good will it be for a man if he gains the whole world, yet forfeits his soul? Or what can a man give in exchange for his soul?
Matthew 16:26


Nor do people light a lamp and put it under a basket, but on a stand, and it gives light to all in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.
Matthew 5:15-16

Your eye is the lamp of your body. When your eye is healthy, your whole body is full of light, but when it is bad, your body is full of darkness. Therefore be careful lest the light in you be darkness. If then your whole body is full of light, having no part dark, it will be wholly bright, as when a lamp with its rays gives you light."
Luke 11:34-36

Stepping Stones: Parenting Without Authority

Transformational Thought

Today’s message is focused on those parents who sent their children off to college about a month ago, and a little memory lane for those that who crossed this Stepping Stone on their life’s growth path. If your kids are adults, never to late to employ this strategy. If they are younger, never to early to start.

The moment, that moment that you said goodbye to the child you were dropping off at college for the first time, got burned into your minds forever. It was in mine.

We have taken this child from diapers to diploma… been the primary influence in her livfe…so many celebrations…some times of sadness and hurt…being involved in most details of her life….and many joys, fears, and surprises filling our memory banks. We want to protect them from so many dangers and hurts…save them from the wrong turns we took back in our teens years. We are concerned they don’t have a protector or advocate like us around anymore. During those two decades, we have seen our child grow so much.

But now it’s your turn to change. The love for your child when he or she leaves home stays pretty constant…but the way you will interact with your child will be significantly different. As you shift roles, be quick to listen and slow to speak. Listen instead of lecture. Begin to create a relationship that fosters communication. Listening first shows you respect them, are giving their ideas and views honor and dignity, are interested and care, and understand that this particular issue is important to them. Listening builds a bridge from your island to theirs (even though the geographical distance is growing) so you can send the important information you want them to hear when they are receptive.

Today, as you continue to make this transition, try and forget about the litany of “who, what, when” interrogation techniques you have relied on since your child became a teenager. Shift your focus now to a more faith based approach. Try praying more. Try an inquiry with your child like: “How would you like me to be praying for you today?” Remember, they have an advocate and protector more powerful, skilled, and with better access to God than we ever could dream of doing ourselves.

Prayer
Dear God, I pray today for all parents who have children in college. I pray that while experiencing this loss, they take this opportunity to grow. They have focused so long on the growth and development of their child, that many times they have neglected themselves physically, mentally, and spiritually. Help these parents know, Father, that their jobs as spiritual leaders within their families never ends. Give them the strength and wisdom to minister to their college children. Help them, Father, to move to a mindset of praying…not prying. Give them all your peace and joy as they experience the sadness of separation and loss so they may receive Your mercy and find grace to help them in their time of need. I pray this in the name of Jesus Christ our savior; and all God’s children say – AMEN!

The Truth
I could have no greater joy than to hear that my children live in the truth
3 John 1:4

Let us approach the throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in time of need.
Hebrews 4:16

Stepping Stones: Are You Adequate Enough?

Transformational Thought

We all have weaknesses, issues, baggage, or shortcomings. But sometimes there is a false standard we develop that contributes to those insecure and inadequate feelings we harbor in our core. That’s why marketing and advertising strategies are so successful. Commercials point out our problems, sometimes with humorous exaggeration, and then tell us, actually sell us, what we need to feel adequate, satisfied, whole, healed, or better in all those areas we struggle.

Actually, we are all born with an accurate sense of our extreme inadequacy. Why? Because, we are separated from God and desperately need Him…in fact, we are designed to need Him. Our sin separates us from God and condemns us. But so many of us carry the constant burden of condemnation, even after accepting Christ’s victory over our sin. These feelings keep our heads down, smiles off our faces, and our lights dimly light. Does this describe you? Does it describe others you know?

These feelings come from a lifetime of arrows constantly launched at us. Some of those arrows come from those closest to us…words and glances of disapproval from parents, friends, spouses, or kids. We are not good enough, smart enough, strong enough, pretty enough. Know that all those arrows originate from our ultimate and only true enemy, Satan. He’s the guy that hands out the arrows. He wants to capitalize on that original feeling of spiritual inadequacy, bankruptcy actually, and have us believe it will always hang around our neck and choke us. Satan is the one who wants us all to be in a constant state of feeling condemned.

Remember that those who shoot the arrows are so full of arrows themselves. (And admit that you too have been an archer). Remember that hurt people, hurt people. They aren’t your real enemy. But you and I and all those who are in Christ Jesus can be condemnation free from this moment onward. Scripture tells us clearly; “There is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.”

Today, watch your words and actions. Don’t let Satan use you like a puppet to launch arrows at others. Guard your thoughts and words. Look to encourage and comfort first, then gently correct. If you are feeling condemned:
1. Repent by confessing your wrongdoing
2. Accept God’s forgiveness, and
3. Stop being so prideful thinking you need to add something to God’s power, grace, or Jesus’ death. Receive all His grace and forgiveness, believe it, and rejoice that our heavenly Father accepts us, the prodigal child, and can truly make us whole. Believe this good news and carry this message to those you know who suffer from inadequacy and condemnation.

Prayer
Dear Father God, I believe You have freed me from all condemnation through the death of Your Son on the cross for my sins. And while I do believe, I still struggle with feelings of condemnation…sometimes for no apparent, present reasons, but I know my past baggage rears its ugly head in subliminal ways. Open my eyes to issues I need to work on and apply Your instruction to. Father, I come to You with an open heart and with a thankful spirit. I ask that You help me experience the full freedom You have made possible for me. Thank You, Lord. I know that I need Your Spirit to help me, but I am unsure of how to fully engage His assistance. Show me the way, Lord. In the name of the most adequate, purifying blood of Jesus; and all God’s children say – AMEN!

The Truth
Therefore, there is no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit of life set me free from the law of sin and death.
Romans 8:1-2

He (the devil) was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies
John 8:44

I am no longer worthy to be called your son. Treat me as one of your hired servants." And he arose and came to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion, and ran and embraced him and kissed him.
And the son said to him, 'Father, I have sinned against heaven and before you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son.' But the father said to his servants, 'Bring quickly the best robe, and put it on him, and put a ring on his hand, and shoes on his feet. And bring the fattened calf and kill it, and let us eat and celebrate.
For this my son was dead, and is alive again; he was lost, and is found.' And they began to celebrate.
Luke 15:19-24

Stepping Stones: Need Balance? Get The Right Focal Point

Transformational Thought

One of my fondest memories as a young father was taking my daughter to ballet lessons. I would stay and watch, and could watch forever. I still see her bright face looking over at me every time she did something challenging. Smiling and raising her eyebrows, saying with her face; “Did you see that Dad?”

When she was being taught how to spin, I vividly remember this special foundational lesson. The teacher told the students to find a focal point, something they could look for and focus on as they completed each turn. She told them this was the necessary secret to maintain their balance as they spin around.

It seems that Satan entices us to spin our Merry-Go-Round of life faster and faster, and we get sucked into the vortex of his trap. The ride’s destination is stress, struggle, frustration, and feelings of being overwhelmed and disoriented. We are so dizzy from the spinning! Why? Because we don’t have a focal point!

Just as a ballerina must keep returning her eyes to a given point to maintain her balance, we need to have a focal point to gain our balance, grounding, and direction. Too often, I used to turn to others, or things of the world to find my balance…but they are not fixed, secure, or immutable like God is. They fluctuate with the winds of life or culture. And people can have agendas that don’t include guiding me or are not in my best interest.

Today, make God your focal point, keep returning your focus to God to keep grounded, focused, or to find your balance. Focus on His promises, character, and teachings. God understands the limitations of your human condition and He knows that you will lose sight of Him at times. The wonderful part of this…you don’t have to strain too hard to look to Him, because His promise is to always be with you. A quick glance His way will bring you back to equilibrium and balance. But you must choose a focal point, it will determine your daily balance.

Prayer
Dear Father, I feel as if the merry-go-round of life is spinning faster and faster. I try hard to regain my balance, but there always seems to be something surprising me and keeping me off balance. I regret I look to transient focal points, and I even know as I look at them that it will be a waste of time and they will disorient me more. I pray for eyes that see the truth and sharply turn to You. I look to You, Lord, to find my equilibrium. I want You to be my focal point. Because You remain constant, you are the perfect focal point. I pray in the immutable name of Jesus; and all God’s children say – AMEN!

The Truth

For I the LORD do not change;
Malachi 3:6

Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith.
Hebrews 12:2

For people swear by something greater than themselves, and in all their disputes an oath is final for confirmation.
So when God desired to show more convincingly to the heirs of the promise the unchangeable character of his purpose, he guaranteed it with an oath,
so that by two unchangeable things, in which it is impossible for God to lie, we who have fled for refuge might have strong encouragement to hold fast to the hope set before us.
We have this as a sure and steadfast anchor of the soul, a hope that enters into the inner place behind the curtain,
where Jesus has gone as a forerunner on our behalf,
Hebrews 6:16-20

Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.
Hebrews 13:8

Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of lights with whom there is no variation or shadow due to change.
James 1:17

"I am the Alpha and the Omega," says the Lord God, "who is and who was and who is to come, the Almighty."
Revelation 1:8

Stepping Stones: Who’s Your Best Friend?

Transformational Thought

I love sports, especially when I was a kid. Sports really were my most loyal and consistent companion growing up. Actually, sports were my best friend and main comforter while growing up, in fact, almost everything I did revolved around sports.

One favorite activity, when I wasn’t feeling connected, heard, or taken seriously, I would go up to my room and re-create pro basketball games in my bedroom. A rolled up pair of socks made a great ball, and a hanging lamp played the basket. I was an awesome shot and in my fantasy game, I always won. My fantasy helped soothe and distract my mind from the hurt, and escape to someplace where I was important, valued, and life was enjoyable.

When we feel misunderstood, devalued, or even just simply overlooked, we turn to things that we believe will make us feel better; eating, shopping, sex, alcohol, drugs, TV, pornography, gossiping, exercise, gardening, knitting, cooking, a business deal, or a work project. The list is endless.

However, after a mild blip of satisfaction, none of these things really make us feel better over the long run. None of these idolatrous substitutes satisfies the thirst for what we truly desire; God’s compassionate, unfailing love. In fact, these substitutes, take us farther away from what God offers us. Satan offers many empty substitutes, only God offers real and lasting love, comfort, and peace.

Today, identify what you turn to for soothing and comfort. Recognize your pattern and strategy. Is it really self-protective or is it actually self-destructive? When you are feeling misunderstood, overlooked…hungry and thirsty for satisfaction, remember this; God is the Lover of your soul, and He understands you perfectly, and loves you eternally. Reach out to Him through prayer, the Word, and listen. Cease striving and know that He is God! Take one promise you know of His and act like you believe it. Your decision, choose well.

Prayer
Dear Father God, I am so thankful that it is my soul that You love, and not my appearance or performance. I am often dissatisfied with both of these…especially when I make them my focus. There are so many empty substitutes in this world, so many things to turn to when I want to feel better about myself, or to provide a distraction so I don’t have to think about why I am hurting. Father, help me experience more fully Your unconditional love. Help me relax in Your loving presence and to always turn my focus to You. I know that You created me to know You, love You, and make You the center of my life. I pray with hope in the name of my best friend, Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say – AMEN!

The Truth
Cease striving and know that I am God; I will be exalted amongst the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.
Psalm 46:10

“Though the mountains may be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed” say the Lord who has compassion on you.
Isaiah 54:10

Stepping Stones: Who Do You Please, God or Man?

Transformational Thought

In High School, I know laughing at a dirty joke was wrong, but I did, and would often follow it up with another dirty joke. Why? Because I feared the rejection of my peers, I didn’t want to be left out of their popular group, or I didn’t want to be laughed at for being too straight-laced. Although good at many activities, I was still insecure.

For many of us, fear of others is so deeply engrained in our minds and our hearts that it’s woven into the daily fabrics of our life. Fear silently debilitates us in so many relationships, in so many ways. Fear of bodily harm is blatant but, while common when we are children, is fairly rare for adults, except for the tragedy that is domestic violence.

For most adults though, fear of others creeps up on us in more subtle ways. Like the fear of being rejected…or being left out…maybe not being accepted…or looking foolish in another person’s eye. Fear could be someone judging you as incompetent or just not being valued. We never set out to be afraid of these things, but due to past hurts or mistakes, these anxieties secretively, but powerfully, warp our relational lenses.

While trying to be a “people-pleaser” may appear harmless on the surface, it can create crippling fear. Elevating their assessment of us to idol status, worshipping it, is what we are really doing. People-pleasing usually requires us to compromise truthful, healthy functioning and replace it with dysfunctional, distorted processing and behavior. Often, we are ultimately choosing to please others and displease God, instead of displeasing others to please God. Fear of displeasing others allows this downward spiral to accelerate and we then feel out of control, because we have given control and power to the people whose opinions control us.

Today, watch you interactions with others. How much of your conduct revolves around pleasing them? Do you think about what God wants from you in that situation? Begin replacing the fear of displeasing others with the dread of displeasing Your Lord. Make pleasing Him your highest priority. In general, we try to please people so that they will give us what we want, approval, value, importance, hope, love, acceptance, forgiveness, destiny, safety, or comfort. Turn your trust to God who is the only source of providing all these things, and so much more…everyday.

Prayer
Dear Father, I am just beginning to realize just how fearful I am of others. I confess Father to being a “people-pleaser.” I am too concerned about displeasing others and looking foolish in their eyes. Help free me of this fear, Father, by developing a deeper trust in You. I know that trusting in others is risky while trusting in You is safe. I know that You have everything I need…that Your riches will never run short. Father, I desire deeply to change and to eliminate my fear of others. I pray in the name of the one who died by my eternal acceptance, Your Son Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
But he said to them, "It is I; don't be afraid."
John 6:20

Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the LORD is kept safe.
Proverbs 29:25

Then Nebuchadnezzar in furious rage commanded that Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego be brought. So they brought these men before the king. Nebuchadnezzar answered and said to them, "Is it true, O Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, that you do not serve my gods or worship the golden image that I have set up? But if you do not worship, you shall immediately be cast into a burning fiery furnace. And who is the god who will deliver you out of my hands?" If this be so, our God whom we serve is able to deliver us from the burning fiery furnace, and he will deliver us out of your hand, O king.
But if not, be it known to you, O king, that we will not serve your gods or worship the golden image that you have set up.
Daniel 3:13,14,17,18

Stepping Stones: Be a Kid!

Transformational Thought

The most rewarding memories I have as a father were when one of my daughters would come to me with a problem. Still to this day, a call from one of my children needing help or guidance evokes such a sense of urgency in me …it becomes my highest priority.

My girl’s requests and the opportunities generate a sense of wellbeing in me for a number of reasons; it tells me they know I love them, tells me that they love me, and finally, it tells me they trust me. As children, we all believe our father has super-human power to tackle and solve any problem, and our mother can soothe and comfort any pain or suffering.

Magical thinking and willingness to suspend reality and believe the impossible is possible…that limitations don’t apply to our parents…that they can read our minds and make our dreams come true. A young child’s mind, not yet fully contaminated by the world’s hurts, failures, and letdowns, has the perfect perspective on how to view God. Maybe this is the reason scripture tells us over and again that being “childlike” is so very important. It’s more than important; it’s a requirement to enter the kingdom of God.

God, as our supreme Father, loves us beyond our human comprehension. And doesn’t a loving father want only the best for his children? Satan uses our parents and the world’s failures to douse this awesome child-like supernatural expectation, understanding, and belief that God instilled and wants to see in us. God’s ways are mysterious to an adult, but to a child, they make perfect sense.

Today, begin receiving the kingdom of God like a little child. Take a confusing or frustrating situation in your day today, and suspend your cynicism and distrust…don’t put God in a box with sides determined by your past hurts, letdowns, and imperfect authority figures. Turn to your Father and ask for his help. Show him that you love and trust Him…acknowledge your awareness that He loves you. Show child-like adoration, trust, belief, and expectation. Then results happen! Your decision, choose well!

Prayer
Dear Father, You are such a loving and generous Father. Thank You, Lord. All glory to You, Father. Like a child turns to their earthly father, I turn to You for love, wisdom, guidance…and especially protection from all things that may bring me harm. I place my trust in Your, Father…I trust You completely. With You, I feel safe. Help me today and everyday to keep Your truths before me…to keep You before me always. Fill me with Your Spirit, my heavenly Father, so that I may grasp the magnitude of Your love for me. I pray that all those who are part of the Stepping Stones community grasp the enormity of Your love for them, Your children. I pray to You in the sacred name of my brother, Your Son Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
“I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it."
Luke 18:17

And my God will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 4:19

This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.
Ephesians 5:32

Whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.
Matthew 18:4

Stepping Stones: Lighthouses Wanted and Needed

Transformational Thought

Our Vision at Lighthouse Network is equipping individuals to achieve their God-given potential by spiritually, psychologically and even biologically renewing their minds so they become Lighthouses that shine God’s glory, stand on firm foundation in the storms of their own life, and provide guidance and sanctuary to others in stormy times. The Stepping Stones Daily Devotional is one of our several outreaches to help people navigate life and become Lighthouses.

When is a lighthouse needed? In a storm, of course! When we are caught in one of life’s many storms, and they can range from a rain shower to a tsunami, it’s easy for us to feel abandoned…to feel as if we are at the mercy of the winds of fate…to feel as if we don’t know which step to take next. The stones before us appear slippery or as stumbling blocks instead of what we need…real helpful solid stepping stones.

As believers, we must remember that God is sovereign. He is everything. He controls the history of the world including our personal destinies, and just as Jesus did for His disciples, He can calm the storms in your life. But if God has need for a storm to rage in your life, He will make peace and comfort available to you if you choose to see and use His Light(house) correctly and continuously. Satan has many imitation lights out there that trick us and bring us to dangerous rocks, so it is important to be in the Word and growing your communication time with God so you know which Lighthouse is real (God’s)… and which is an imitation (Satan’s).

Today, stop and think about how God has served as a Lighthouse throughout your life, and about the events in your life that have led you to where you are today. Reflect on some of the false lights you followed, thinking they were God’s Lighthouses. What made them look so attractive? How can you recognize that imitation in the future?

If you are in a storm, God is lighting your next stepping stones, but you have to look in His direction and then trust Him to step forward. Let God be your lighthouse and harbor, your place of safety. It’s your decision which Light you pursue, God’s or satan’s, choose well!

If you are in a stable place, think of someone near who is in a storm. How can you be a Lighthouse to them today? Not by shining your light, but rather by letting God’s light shine through you.

Prayer
Dear Father, I am once again in another storm, a downpour. I’m tired of going from storm to storm. I know I have created some of these storms through my sinful nature and the bad choices…but I also experience storms that have nothing to do with my action, like the death of a loved one, losing my job because of the economy, events that are out of my control. When in the midst of a storm I feel scared and alone…and I don’t know which step to take next. I need Your light, Lord, to shine on my next Stepping Stones of my path to develop the mind of Christ. Help me and all those reading this devotional to walk in Your light so that we may become the daughters and sons of light. Thank You, Father. There is so much I don’t know. I pray that You fill me with Your Holy Spirit so that I may understand more and more. I pray this in the name of the Light of the world, Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
As they sailed, he fell asleep. A squall came down on the lake, so that the boat was being swamped, and they were in great danger. The disciples went and woke him, saying, "Master, Master, we're going to drown!" He got up and rebuked the wind and the raging waters; the storm subsided, and all was calm. "Where is your faith?" he asked his disciples. In fear and amazement they asked one another, "Who is this? He commands even the winds and the water, and they obey him."
Luke 8:23-25

At first his disciples did not understand all this. Only after Jesus was glorified did they realize that these things had been written about him and that they had done these things to him.
John 12:16

Then Jesus told them, "You are going to have the light just a little while longer. Walk while you have the light, before darkness overtakes you. The man who walks in the dark does not know where he is going. Put your trust in the light while you have it, so that you may become sons of light." When he had finished speaking, Jesus left and hid himself from them.
John 12:35-36

Stepping Stones: Are You A BOB?

Transformational Thought

In the middle of junior year, I moved to New Jersey to finish high school. I left behind a lot of friends that I had known for a several years and shared many great experiences with. New Jersey was different in so many ways…especially with lots of temptations and a faster pace. My big dilemma, I did not know who to hang out with…the popular guys…the jocks…the heads (drugs)….the troublemakers….the punkers….the brains…the clowns. Never thought of hanging out with the Christians, because they were boring. Each group had pros and cons. What I didn’t realize was the group I picked would have a big influence on me.

One of the first days at my new school, I met my new baseball coach….a different guy with a mixed reputation amongst the students. On away game bus trips, he had a saying, “Don’t be a BOB!” I asked my teammates what the heck a “BOB” was and they told me: B.O.B….Back of the Bus-er. Coach knew the troublemakers always went to the back of the bus to smoke, make-out, vandalize the seats, pick on others, gossip about teammates or coaches, moon other cars, etc. I looked at who was at the back, both on the team bus and the bus to school in the morning, and I realized that he was right. BOB wasn’t necessarily a geographical identifier as much as a character identifier. Are you a BOB? Do you hang out with BOBs? How do you identify the BOB’s now, as an adult?

Today, take a look at your character. Are you handling yourself the way you should? How could you be an anti-BOB in tough situations, instead being a Lighthouse to others? Are there BOBs you are letting influence you? Why are you going to the back of the bus if you know that’s where the BOBs are? If you don’t make an intentional decision to avoid the BOBs, you will gravitate to them and they will influence you. Remember, some BOB’s are wolves dressed in sheep’s clothing, so watch out for the subtle deceptions of the evil one.

Prayer
Dear Father, thank You for loving me even when my character at times is questionable and I act like a BOB. Thanks for sending Your son to model the character that delights You and also will bring me the most fulfillment in life. Please help me develop eyes that really see BOBs and anti-BOBs and courage to avoid the acute thrills the BOBs will bring. Help me submit to the Holy Spirit’s guidance as I see who You put in my life to guide me and model Godly character. Help me be more aware of the influence I have on my kids and family, and be a better steward of my heart and the behaviors that flow out of it. In Jesus’ precious name; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
For consider your calling, brothers: not many of you were wise according to worldly standards, not many were powerful, not many were of noble birth.
But God chose what is foolish in the world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong;
1 Corinthians 1:26-27

Show yourself in all respects to be a model of good works, and in your teaching show integrity, dignity, and sound speech that cannot be condemned, so that an opponent may be put to shame, having nothing evil to say about us.
Titus 2:7-8

Stepping Stones: What Kind of Character is Your Adversity Revealing?

Transformational Thought

During President Clinton’s dark time, a news reporter tried to pull George Bush Sr. into a Clinton bashing session. Bush offered only two words that said it all: “Character Counts”.

Character is the set of outward facing qualities that tell our friends, our families, and the world who we really are on the inside. Character is the reflection of what is really at the center of our heart. It’s not about the words we speak, as anybody can say anything. It’s about how we live our lives, since our outward behaviors usually reveal the attitudes and motivators in our heart.

Anybody can pretend and wear a mask to hide the true nature of what is on the inside. That’s where pressure, stress, life’s storms, or a bit of adversity come into play. You see, it is much more difficult to put on a mask in the midst of challenging circumstances….it is often during those storms where people’s true colors are more easily revealed. It’s what makes us interesting and attractive, or reveals some inner ugliness!

Pressure and adversity push what’s inside us up to the surface. It shows what our default settings are, and whether we are God focused or me focused.

So how do we develop Character? In Romans 5:3-4, Paul teaches us that suffering produces character. While it is admittedly difficult, try to see and be thankful for the fact that God is using life’s difficulties…and Satan’s attacks…to build your character. God brings storms to 1. build character, 2. show us what is at the center of our heart, or 3. allow us to succeed, shining His glory to others to guide them through their storms.

Today, take notice when things don’t go your way, what is your behavior revealing about the character of your heart? What is your knee-jerk response? What if you did the first action that came to mind, what would you learn about your heart? You can build character, but it will take intentionality and practice. Better to practice building character, because if you aren’t, you are practicing being a me-centered slug by default. Your choice, so choose well.

Prayer
Dear Father, Thank You, God, for the opportunities you give me, through my difficulties, to grow in Your strength. I pray that You help me develop character that pleases You and allows me to be an example of a good child of Yours. I confess, Lord, that I spend too much time and energy on my image management. Help me shift that effort to improving my character. Suffering and difficulty seems to be the norm for me rather than the exception. Help me, Father, to use these difficulties and suffering to build perseverance…and use perseverance to build my character. With Godly character, hope will be strong and abundant. I ask in the name of our Suffering Servant, Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.
Romans 5:3-4

But the LORD said to Samuel, "Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart."
1 Samuel 16:7

Stepping Stones: Are You Giving Others Power Over You?

Transformational Thought

We have been discussing forgiveness for several days: what it is, what it isn’t, and why it is important. Today, I will tell you about the aspect of forgiveness that pushed me to really forgive even though it seemed hard to. You see, I played a lot of sports and was a very competitive person…my kids would say I still am. When I got wronged, my competitive nature (as well as some other baggage) would kick in. I wasn’t going to let anybody beat me! I needed my rival to realize that I was in control of them…that I wasn’t beaten…that they would hurt more than me.

To satisfy my competitive nature, I needed something from them. For them to admit they were wrong, or take responsibility for their action, maybe feel some significant pain or suffer a consequence, to pay a penance for their transgression against me, or for them to make the hurt all better. Do you realize the problem this mindset makes for me? My happiness, relief, or comfort depended on the other person doing “something.”

Therefore, I was giving my “rivals” power over me, because they can withhold the “something” that I needed as long as they wanted. Me needing that “something” from them puts me in a dependent position to them and what they want to do. I had trouble seeing the relationship with them clearly and moving forward because I still needed “something” from them.

Bitterness, inferiority, fear, rage, nervousness, injustice, revenge, and many other uneasy feelings would course through me when I saw or thought of my rivals or transgressors. A lot of my behaviors were to try to inflict pain on them or push them to see how they wronged me. Finally, I realized how much power and influence over me I was granting them. I figured out I don’t want to give them the power, but also, I don’t handle the power well myself. So I decided to give the power over to God. He has the power, deserves the power, and will always see that justice is administered. I just need to let God do His job and I can then follow God’s instructions to me.

Today, try to identify people that have power over you, or who negatively dominate your thought world. Chances are you probably haven’t really forgiven them and still need “something” from them for you to move forward. Think why you need that “something”. That is your issue. Quit pointing the finger at others. God has given you way more than you could ever need or want, so what can someone else possibly give you that you think you can’t move on without? Your choice whether you will give them power over you or not, so choose well.

Prayer
Dear Father, thanks for helping me learn how to forgive. Help me desire, think, and act in such a way that You are the one I want to have power over me. Help me to really see the forgiveness You extend to me and not worry about what others will or will not do. Help me see the evil one as the real enemy, and not think my transgressor is the enemy. I pray in the name of Jesus and His forgiving blood; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
Where there is forgiveness of these, there is no longer any offering for sin.
Hebrews 10:18

Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
Ephesians 4:32

Stepping Stones: Biblical Forgiveness vs. Forgiveness Myths

Transformational Tip

The last couple days we have talked about persecution and forgiveness, two very important and complex topics. As a psychiatrist, I see many misunderstandings or myths about what real Biblical forgiveness actually is. Like, 1. Forgive is forgetting, 2. forgive is starting with a clean slate like nothing ever happened, 3. forgive is trusting just like you did before the transgression, 4. forgive is not ever bringing the incident up again. These are some common misconceptions of forgiveness I hear from peers and patients.

Some conclusions from the Bible:
1. God never forgets, He is omniscient.
2. God took David’s and Moses’ sin into account long after their sins, therefore no clean slate.
3. God only trusts us as far as our skill set and reliance on Him (spiritual maturity) as evidenced by our past track record.

Let’s look at an example of a husband who has an affair. It is important to not forget the incident happened because a lot of work needs to be done to figure out why it happened and how to ensure it doesn’t happen again. You can’t act as if nothing happened as the husband obviously has some deficits and areas of temptation and needs to be safeguarded and held accountable for him and the marriage to heal and grow. So if he comes home very late one night with a lame excuse, the wife needs to remember the past and ask the who, what, where, why, and when, to make sure he didn’t stumble or isn’t on a slippery slope. She can’t jump into a pre-affair level of trust until he proves trustworthy based on present behavior. Anything more would be unfair and unhealthy for her and for him.

Forgiving or being forgiven doesn’t elevate someone’s trustability. She needs to bring it up the event when necessary to facilitate regular assessment, accountability, and growth, or if she sees some worrisome warning signs. She knows his area of temptation and stumbling so she has to keep it in mind to help him grow and avoid it.

Biblical Forgiveness has 2 key components. First, giving up the dysfunctional anger like bitterness, revenge, spite, rage, self-contempt, etc. you have for the transgression, the transgressor, or toward God for letting the hurtful event happen. Second, when we have been wronged, our nature is to want, need, and demand some payment from the transgressor. We really need to turn this over to God as the great judge and executioner; He is the only one who can determine what is the fair and appropriate sentence or punishment for the infraction. Just like He is for us and our many sins against others. For more, The Choosing to Forgive Workbook, by Les Carter and Frank Minirth, MD is great at expanding on these points with practical application.

Today, in those situations where you are struggling to forgive, or you have forgiven but it still hangs over you, think “what am I still trying to get out of them as payment?” It may be you need an apology from them, or you need them to feel your pain. Maybe they need to have a consequence or punishment, have to pay some kind of material restitution, or make a public acknowledgment to others about what they did to you. If your happiness is based on getting that and they never give it, where does that leave you? Quit continuing to give them the power over you. Forgive, and let God extract whatever payment He judges necessary for their growth. Your choice, choose well.

Prayer
Dear Father, Thanks be to You, Lord, for Your incredible gift of forgiveness. Where would I be without it…buried under a ton of sin and shame. I am so quick to ask for Your Forgiveness, Lord…but so slow to forgive others. Help me remember that forgiving others lifts a heavy burden off me…and places me back under the grace of Your forgiveness. I thank You, Lord, for the many examples of forgiveness demonstrated by Your Son Jesus. I seek to forgive as Jesus forgave…I seek the mind of Christ. Help me to understand I am not one to judge them and exact payment, but their transgression against me, although it hurts me, is even a greater transgression against Your holiness and You are the perfect one to hand out justice or grace, as You in Your omniscience and love for them, knows is best. Grow in me a humble spirit to accept Your actions in their life and focus on my actions, thoughts, and heart, and not theirs. Help me, Lord, spread Your message about forgiveness in word, but especially in action. I pray this in the name of Jesus Christ, who loved and sacrificed so much for my forgiveness; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
That very day the LORD spoke to Moses, Go up this mountain of the Abarim, Mount Nebo, which is in the land of Moab, opposite Jericho, and view the land of Canaan, which I am giving to the people of Israel for a possession. And die on the mountain which you go up, and be gathered to your people, as Aaron your brother died in Mount Hor and was gathered to his people, because you broke faith with me in the midst of the people of Israel at the waters of Meribah-kadesh, in the wilderness of Zin, and because you did not treat me as holy in the midst of the people of Israel. For you shall see the land before you, but you shall not go there, into the land that I am giving to the people of Israel."
Deuteronomy 32:48-52

And when you stand praying, if you hold anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may forgive you your sins.
Mark 11:25

Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.
Ephesians 4:32