Friday, May 21, 2010

Stepping Stones: “The Ultimate Deal”

Transformational Tip

Yesterday, we discussed our curiosity and need to make deals. After passing through the deal making stage, many people concerned about a loved one with a life-controlling problem reach the point of acceptance…and then they make the ultimate deal.

Acceptance is a welcome place of relief. Now we can finally turn our loved one over to God. To His love and discipline, to His mercy and grace. To His healing power. Turning our struggling loved one over to God does not mean that we no longer care what happens to him, but that we have accepted the reality of the situation and the fact that we can't fix the problem on our own.

This is where we emotionally detach ourselves from our loved ones, even as we continue to love them and trust God's guidance in redesigning our role in their life. The ultimate deal we make is with God. We surrender our need for the other person to change, or for us to be the change agent. We get in return, God can conform us to the likeness of Christ.

Today, acknowledge that our loved ones are, themselves, responsible for their own behavior…accept our powerlessness to change them. Admit that we need nothing from anybody for us to experience peace, contentment, and growth. Tying our happiness to someone else’s behavior is a copout, an excuse, conforming to the flesh’s view and strategy. Let go and let God and reap “The Ultimate Deal.”

Click here to share your perspective about why you focus one what others need to do for you to be happy or content.

Prayer
Dear Father God, help me come to this point of acceptance. I know I can't fix my loved one's problems. I know he has to take responsibility for his own choices. Help me to let go. Help me to rest in You, knowing that You love this one even more than I and that You alone are able to help him. Help me be dependent on You, not someone else’s actions for my joy and happiness. I pray this and all prayers in the name of the One who is my rock and my salvation, Jesus Christ; and all God’s children say - AMEN!

The Truth
Let all that I am wait quietly before God, for my hope is in him. He alone is my rock and my salvation, my fortress where I will not be shaken.
Psalm 62:5-6